bidge

GREAT news

Sir I have deep respect for you and your advanced age and your love of custard but please can you get that blepharitis looked at. Can I mail you some demodex. I don't know where to get it but I'll figure it out. I'll mail it in a hollowed-out cake. Please. Your eyelids do not need to be doing that

Hi! Is the costume contest for the participants or the dildos? Because I for one would love to design a little penis jacket, or perhaps a dashing cap

She knows what life is about

She!!

Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver

Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver
theonion.com/report-...

i 🩵 drinking water

Tho like. This is my counter right now

I took this photo of my counter when I got back from Christmas and had to reckon with what I'd previously considered to be a reasonable number of water bottles waiting for their turn in the fridge

Looking up carabineer earrings, scrolling thru results until

Florida man :: Spanish flu

Ireland got its first snow in like 5 yrs last week and my mom made a little snowman. A few days later everything melted except the snowman which was instead stolen by a small gang of local lads

A stack of marshmallow coconut cookies called SPONCH

SPONCH

Getting affectionately ribbed by the uncles at the car repair place for waiting so long to get my snow tires on

*now

My school is emailing me about a combined 'how to invest ' and 'how to find a therapist ' lunch event

I have covid AND fruit flies. No one is more oppressed than I

I googled to make sure I spelled cordyceps correctly and every article is like THE HEALTH BENEFITS OF CORDYCEPS so. ok.

I have covid so I'm supposed to be rotting in bed, usually my favorite activity, but not I'm like 'But I WANT to go to the grocery store and the library and the bakery' and all the usual chores I dread. Is covid cordyceps-ing me to spread itself

I got all the lore, the embarrassing stories, the complex revisions to the family tree. My family is small and doesn't rly do thanksgiving so this was completely new to me. I brought food + helped w dishes so I'm basically an honorary cousin now. I'm even in the family photo. I have like 5 new aunts

I'm not over how my preceptor's family accepted me at Thanksgiving no questions asked. Granted she's terrifying so no one could rly object but like...I got dragged outside to count muskrats, the cousins insisted I join the "stoplight squad" bc we all blush easily, my fridge is groaning w leftovers

(For HIPAA reasons I've changed the details slightly but I think I successfully conveyed the vibe)

It's a shame I can't ethically follow up w any of the pts I see during clinicals bc I desperately want to befriend the guy who told me all about his plan for an elaborate Peanuts themed butt tattoo

I'm so used to saying "I'm not sick, I just always wear a mask" to any new person I interact with and being met with a blank stare that I was genuinely shocked when my hairdresser was like "ok cool let me get mine" and came back in a KN95

out west there is a kind of “flat vermont” known as Minnesota

I'm having trouble uploading pics on here but imagine this is a photo of the FROM THE RIVER TO THE SEA olive branch patches I just got in the mail with the caption "hell yeah"

tip: use bones to give your body a more consistent shape and usable limbs

Cheerfully destroying my sleep schedule for no reason right before my second week of clinicals ☺️