Wemby played chess with folks in Washington Square Park in New York City

Omg you guys I'm so excited for "am I sick again or just exhausted or broke or just very cold or hungry or awash in the existential terror of knitting together the end of this year with the beginning of the next one and slowly realizing they're both part of the same design" week. So stoked.

just wanna retire and go live in some quaint seaside town with my cat where i run a little bookstore that sells magical potions and spells that turn idiots into frogs and maybe help solve a local murder every now and then.

My parents’ dog got a medal for graduating puppy school 😭

At the end of the day, don’t we all just want a bookshelf with a rolling ladder?

Murder and plastic surgery. ☠️

Public library energy is the best energy. Like here is all the knowledge we could find, it's been meticulously organized and vetted and it will cost you nothing today, welcome to the absolute pinnacle of human civic evolution, feel free to pull up any bean bag chair you like

✨Me turning into a Georgia stan over night ✨

[ a morally superior quip about rape is still a rape joke, it’s just a rape joke that comes with a NPR tote bag and tickets to a show at The Public where you sit with other people who all feel that, of course, rape is awful but what did she expect being around a guy like that, leopards and faces ]

What if she exposes everybody and then gets Cawthorned. 🙏🏻

My apartments at the level of dirty where if I go missing the police would suspect foul play

It’s so embarrassing. He’s obviously seeing how much the Senate will bend the knee.

every single cabinet announcement

we’re like three days out from trump putting dr phil in the united states cabinet just in case anyone wants to begin psychologically preparing

*glares at Oprah*

Just got another news alert for a cabinet nomination and this time it’s Dr Oz???

Imma need some of you to think about thriving out of spite. I had big plans for 2025 and I’m definitely not gonna pre-derail them for likes of Elin and Tromp. I’m getting more involved. Loving harder. Writing hornier. Having more fun. I’m gonna be so kind to my neighbors, bitch.

Well let’s give this platform a go.