Fernando D. Maldonado

the end is nigh, etc.

Every one of these guys thinks they’re Oppenheimer mixed with Andrew Carnegie and they own something called SplortDotCom that got bought by Boozoo

some people give so little fucks that they actually take them

my favorite girl wrote about my favorite wrestler for today's essay in @essaydaily.bsky.social's advent calendar. has me thinking families should gather round the tv to watch wrestling matches instead of football games on christmas day...

whenever toxic online fandom gets you down, just pretend they're talking about the brady bunch

a movie called nosferatatouille, where a bat sits on draculas head and turns him into a world-renowned pastry chef

Se7en is a Christmas movie because people talk about the Bible and Brad Pitt gets a present at the end.

starting to think that netflix does not have the best interests of the participants in its dystopian dating shows in mind

one of my top five television performances of the year

in my new york era of not knowing whether i can't find a place because i can't remember its name or it simply no longer exists

lofi beats to ignore the slow motion apocalypse to

considering getting a "bless this mess" forehead tattoo a la jared leto's joker. i'm not accepting feedback at this time.

wordle bot talking down to me every day like we're not solving these things in the same number of steps

I just want to RIP while I'm alive.

holiday weekend national treasure on the big screen is a warm blanket for my soul.

Men don't go "Yabba Dabba Doo" anymore

i'm feeling net negative about advertising these days.

“Ok, so, here’s the thing...” - me reluctantly lending someone my Blu-ray of my favourite John Carpenter film

James Bond movies never show the part where the supervillain collects government subsidies to build his death tech.

time sure does fly when you sit in a windowless room all day.

This just happened

mike tyson giving me flashbacks to biden at the june debate

you’re some kind of lonesome when you say goodbye to the automated customer service bot.