With my mum at Pride 2014. I’m wearing a GMFA tshirt that reads ‘Better choices, better health, great sex’ and she’s wearing a tshirt that reads ‘I ❤️ my gay son’.

Today marks 6 years since my mother, Hatta, died.
She was a fierce supporter of #LGBTQ rights, going to Pride marches and setting up a support group for families of LGBT children.
I miss her but I have grown used to her absence.
NB the back of her T-shirt said, ‘And my straight daughters’.

I got set up with a guy who I had no interest in, went to the pity date because my plans for that day feel through and well we end up doing it and ended up conceiving and now we have three kids and get married this weekend. Oops.

I think my wife is trying to get me to cheat on her so she can divorce me and try to take everything off me. She's had 'friends' come round for drinks & when she goes to the bathroom they 'come on' to me. I'm not that stupid, I'd rather keep what I have now than fall for that!

Years ago, as a youth coming home after a party, I put my used clothes in the laundry basket. Later, in my room, I found the "just in case" condom I had had in my pocket with a note "Found this in the washer. Suggest you bin it as it was on a hot cycle. Love Mum".

Used to travel with the same three guys monthly for work, fancied one of their wives so I "accidently" video called her to talk about their son's first day at new school whilst my colleague talked about his latest escort in the background. This week my stepson turned 16.

My mum once caught me with a dumbell weight tied with string to my willy, in a naive, dangerous and fruitless attempt to lengthen it. I've never heard her laugh so hard for so long, and I still cringe whenever I remember it 30 years later. I hope she never told anyone.

I can’t believe I have to say this, but historically, masked men who kidnap families in the middle of the night are usually not the good guys.

Canada vs. America

This strikes me as pretty bad

Make America Great Again…

GTF Out!

I feel like this photo of masked, armed men pepper spraying a pastor protecting his community is going to be a defining picture of this moment in America for a long, long time.

In the early days of Wikipedia I created a fake entry about my village that included a fake Lord in the middle ages named after an 80s B Movie action hero. It is still up and being taught in the local Primary school as fact.

My wife doesn't have assigned drawers for any of her clothes. T-shirts go in with dresses, trousers with jumpers, even towels are chucked in anywhere. Her socks go in my sock drawer. This should be her fess, but she doesn't see the problem.

I often find myself scrolling through my photos to pick out the best ones of my kids, so I could give them to the newspaper in the event of them having a tragic accident.

Wannabe Stark
#cringe

My favorite sticker. 🇺🇸

Englishman here, married to a wonderful American lady, living in the US. Initially she was horrified by my use of the word "cunt" as it is only used as a pejorative against women here. This morning she asked, "Who turned the air conditioning on? Some cunt?" Never been prouder.

Elderly parents living on a pension - also very proud so I signed them up for a bonus card with the nearest supermarket. Every few weeks I put money on it and then they get asked if they'd like to use their balance - they think it's from points they've collected.

My partner is deaf. One handy advantage to this is that I don't need to hold in my farts, I can just potter around the house parping like a wet whoopee cushion. Problem is I now can't switch it off when we have visitors, including my mother-in-law. She's not deaf.

I had pain in my left thumb going down towards my wrist for years. I solved it easily. I take the dog out late every night and when I pick up his poo I bag it up and squelch it like therapeutic putty. So excited it's winter soon and am looking forward to warm left hand.

I always say "bless you" to random people when they sneeze. This has led to me sleeping with two strangers. It's a great ice breaker