Chillary Clinton

There's video out there of two dudes fucking each other in the ass, and it's still not as gay as Kid Rock's Half Assed Show

The Israeli spy in charge of following me just put my bris on my Google calendar. Seems a bit late for that, to be fair

BREAKING NEWS: Starscream is NOT in the Epstein Files

So, my dog almost dies of a grand mal seizure last night and I'm just supposed to go to work tomorrow? The fuck?

MAGA: THE SECOND AMENDMENT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE CONSTITUTION

Also those diaper baby retard fucks when the fucking piss drinking pedo President of the United States okays literal execution in the streets:

Good Lord, he's turning into Voldemort faster than I thought

Bad Bunny should get up there at the Super Bowl, do a great set and then just end the last few minutes with silence. Can you imagine how Looney Tunes level pissed MAGA would be if their beloved pass time was interrupted for a few minutes by person of color by not saying anything

I wonder what the first Dilbert comic written from hell will be like

I don't need good vibes, I need ICE agents getting curb stomped on my FYP daily

Sorry, ma'am. It's a schlort

You ever accidently leave your phone at home and have to rawdog work?

Me on Tuesday at 5:30pm

Hurtful but you right

Mad lib ass post

Woody Allen was at the island? The island where they diddled kids? Woody Allen? The guy that married his daughter with a 35 year age gap? That Woody Allen? Get the fuck out of here

He wouldnt hear me on account he dusted his face off

At least we know which way the guns go

Tiktok can remove my comment but they can't remove Israel's blood soaked cock from their mouths.

20 likes and I'll fart really loudly in this zoom meeting at work

a bald man stands in front of a crowd in a stadium with a sign that says the next thing ALT: a bald man stands in front of a crowd in a stadium with a sign that says the next thing

Honored

I'm not sorry, I have killed, and will kill again

Men (and cool women) yearn for the nipple

We should put more billionaires in more subs, just streamline the process at this point

"Being nice is free!" Yeah, so is being a hater

Gooch scooch

You ever walk past people talking and accidentally gain NPC lore?