Zombieland Matt

I personally can't wait for "Love At Isle Royale National Park" where some perfectly attractive actors have a meet cute on a piney strand while a group of wolves are just stripping an elk carcass to the joints in the background

AY VITO YOU FEELIN' A LITTLE ELDRITCH TODAY

So what's the answer other than shouting "GRAHHH HIT MORE GOODERER" and being real mad online?

And if you could pick when you hit well, we'd see a lot more dramatic finishes. Shit happens.

Judge is batting .500 in the playoffs with a 1.381 OPS but people are STILL saying he's "choking".

Being superhuman doesn't help when the rest of your team are basically the 1962 Mets with an inner ear disorder.

That's one of my things too. Thought it was fairly Michigan-specific. TIL!

I am so horrible at reading hits off the bat in person. Sitting there with my scorebook at the stadium:

"WOW, he really got ahold of tha-"

(scribbles F-6 in his book)

I think that statement made it into at LEAST three channels? Maybe four?

It was going pretty well up until Fried was pulled! I had to duck out for my own sanity at that point.

We've committed to calling these "Boonedoggles"

I'm still trying to figure out why Boone pulled Fried when he did. Other than, you know, being Boone.

Y'all can hate on this EA deal all you want, us old-school haters are still pissed about how they did Origin dirty.

Lunchtime Escape The Everpresent Horror thoughts:

Would Coco Crisp batting against Rocky Cherry be the tastiest-sounding at bat in MLB history? I gotta think it's up there somewhere.

I haven't seen the world's richest man and the world's most powerful man go at each other like this since Annie.

I still have the Tolkien map from my original LOTR burned into my brain. I can see the red lettering floating up into my vision.

We got falcons on the Verrazano Narrows, the Tappan Zee (miss me with that other name), and the Bayonne Bridge.

It's hot falcon summer!

There is nothing more midwestern than hearing the opening chords of Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald and coming to straight-backed attention.

Lettering on a crossword puzzle.

Love this color. Birmingham Pen Company Ohio River.

Defector | The last good website. Defector is an employee-owned sports and culture website brought to you by the former staffers of Deadspin.

I always feel strange doing this sort of thing but Defector.com has had an incredible January, just a ton of really good stories on a wide range of topics, and I suggest subscribing to it. I am biased, obviously, but I am really proud and grateful to get to do this the way we're doing it.

Small cut on a finger.

Finished building a PC for my boys last night, and it's officially a project after the requisite blood sacrifice.

Why would anyone even want an incandescent bulb anymore?

May thy platters spin faithfully.

You're talking about a world where maybe a plurality of people don't believe in climate change because they got a half an inch of snow while Australia burns.

Is there a specific kink for getting aroused by Stellaris border gore? I feel like there's a German word for it.

A gold fountain pen nib against a blue fabric backdrop.

Some Saturday nib pr0n.

Platinum President 18k Medium.

Update from the front lines - got Whammed at the dentist yesterday.

This breaks a decade-long streak of surviving.

Broken lanyard clasp.

Of all the things I did not expect to add to my list of weekly grievances, metal fatigue was pretty high on the list.

WHY IS THE CON-40 SO SMALL GRAAAAHHHHH

NYT crossword done in blue ink.

Not gonna lie, pretty happy with my lettering on this last one.

The missus and I enjoyed it very much. Keep up the good work!