Tim Becile

The price of bottled water?

Whitney Houston should have married Gene Pitney.

Has she said 'Britian' yet?

"15 years ago, Polish workers came here to find opportunity. Now Poland is growing twice as fast as we are," says Kemi Badenoch.

Any ideas what may have happened in the interim?

Is he planning a Rod Hull and Emu style pursuit of anyone whose face isn’t the same colour as his?

The fact that Gulpy’s become one of the Tories ‘main players’ reveals much about why they are in the state they’re in.

Very true, but very few are as odious as Jenrick.

Jenrick is an odious little maggot.

Can hear hear himself?

Coin-servatives?

No bollocks for old men
The Italian bollocks
The sound of bollocks
Chitty Chitty bollocks bang
The Long Good bollocks

This is The Sea, Waterboys.

Bollocks on a hot tin roof.

Kemi Gaffenoch

Love this, but that scurf won’t have to dip her hand into her pathetic lingerie.

Only downside was the lack of influencers. Just look at what they add.

Drank copious amounts of tea (and made the majority of them) when I was a Saturday boy at a proper butcher's shop in the 70's. No coffee on offer.

The Sweetener Hill Gang

Dr Feelaverage

I love coffee, but find that tea ‘wakes me up’ better, before I switch.

Grumpchuckle?

Bill Haley and the Comet staff.

I have to count some sand when his enthralling new show airs.

Is Angers Cynthia's husband?

Dacia in the Rye

They should rename it the 'Ferrariage show'.

Why, thank you Sir!