Weirdly, I often have the exact opposite problem.

Ladies, gentleman, I have come to the conclusion that this may, in fact, not be the best of all possible worlds.

I dislike this reply.

Disliking things is my whole personality.

Landlord organisations are claiming that giving renters rights is going to lead to a lot of landlords selling up, with a family buying that house. And they think that's an argument against it.

But thanks to the magic of penicillin, we can get rid of a lot of them.

Remember, British Summer Time, the most ironically named daylight savings time, ends at 2AM. But only the first 2AM.

It would probably suck.

I'm so sorry.

In disappointing news, I am, once again, awake.

The only thing that could possibly distract me from the Epstein files is if they brought back Google Reader.

*Crosses fingers*

Good morning, fellow horological truther.

I've created an awesome plan to be incredibly productive this week, but I'm stuck on the "get out of bed" step.

I keep telling people practice makes perfect, but I'm still not very good at it.

That sounds like a challenge.

The thing about coming back to social media is it reminds you why you went away from social media.

They wouldn't have to be so loud if you'd just PAY ATTENTION and ANTICIPATE THEIR EVERY DESIRE.

Happy flying ant day to all those who celebrate.

Really looking forward to seeing an old friend from university tomorrow, and the mental gymnastics of how to pretend my life hasn't been an abject failure!

I think so?

Me too!

I'm firing blanks.

Trump's nomination for the Nobel Peace Prize gives the committee an interesting dilemma - what to do when one of the nominees is likely to bomb you if they don't win?