iinad🧉

it’s funny how you can manufacture exclusively to a bar if you just make the entrance out of anything other than a door. surprisingly foolproof.

having a fat ass isn’t a physical attribute, it’s a state of mind

if business men made deals while playing soccer instead of golf the world would suck less

my cats look like pedro pascal and sabrina carpenter

a self-style photograph of me and timpy tumpus

Me when I got that sugar on lock

this was a combined effort from @anderspollack.com and i

she glaston my bury til i yurt

Add an extra line to Norm! and they’re shouting Worm!

keep honking, i’m thinking about academy award winner marissa tomei in the floral backless body suit from 1992’s foremost procedural comedy my cousin vinny

Mouseland

The Storyteller of Mousepotamia

anyway, here is my cat

hot takes in which people call a trend or popular opinion “literal fascism” are, ironically, equally helpful to fascism. if everything is fascism then nothing is.

Tinsel the calico glares at you with a furrowed brow

“I asked chatGPT-“ ok, and I asked Tinsel, and she said you’re an uninspired, vapid dork who needs a computer to think for them.

if you enjoy a bunch of old men in fancy dresses gossiping under wild circumstances, and beautiful cinematography- then it’s great. if you’re looking for something more, it’s worth the watch, but you’ll probably be like “oh, okay.”

i have a coworker who is really nice, but she’s quiet and pretty and has a lot of botox, so everyone thought she was mean. the girls have made an effort to get to know her and learned it’s not true, while the guys have just been making fun of her behind her back. idk just something to think about

Omg same

asking my doctor to prescribe me ozempic for no other reason than to make it easier to be lifted into the atmosphere by holding too many balloons

Now the Bears get to embarrass the city AND catholic god

i once saw the new pope do a bump in the secret bathroom at east room

gonna ask my therapist if i can klarna our session

see u in oakland for my bday 😈

let @kneecapceol.bsky.social do a tiny desk

i wonder if the celebrities on celebrity jeopardy allowed to write off their donated winnings on their taxes

i’m homesick 🥺 as usual

last time i was home, i was in penn station and i’ll never know what lead to this, but a little girl (maybe 10 at the oldest) looked her grandma in the eyes, perplexed and exclaimed in a perfect long island accent “are you new??”

you’re telling me a blimp flied this skies?

fantastic outfit

if news is stressing you the fuck out, i recommend following a ton of artist starter packs and then clinging to the "popular with friends" tab like a life raft .

here's one i made feel free to share some good ones below go.bsky.app/VKGhQ6E

having a very Bad Time applying for jobs. if the economy is going to collapse can it just, like, do that already?

i didn't realize rascal flatts looked like that