Jamie

One month on, C is addicted and anxious when the jar is running low and tells me to go by the big Waitrose on the way home for more Chinese leaf. Down the kimchi mines, feel like the dad from Parasite

Mysteries of half-term: what the fuck happens to all the Prittstick lids? The Prittsticks are there so it's not like they stole them, did they put the lids in their pockets? In the bin?

Charlie has got us 3 months of Mubi for a quid. Really stoked to watch a hard-hitting film about malnourished chavs in Transnistria tonight

You can tell she's enjoying herself too, it's always quite playful

There is a new bar in New Cross where all pints are £2.50. Have been there twice in the past week and there's barely a soul in the place, despite the offer being advertised. Maybe everyone else thought it had to be an organ-harvesting scam.

Now that Marias and Kadare are gone, I think Olga Tokarczuk is my favourite living author. Her new one is a mash-up of The Magic Mountain and The Wicker Man, and definitely did not disappoint.

They need to stop air/bacteria entering the jar but also allow gas to escape

A Real Pain, aka The Trip to Poland: what a treat to see the brilliant Kieran Culkin do his thing in a feature film. Heavy themes given a light touch, it is wistful, funny and sad.

Charlie is the artistic director and I just peel and chop vegetables. I think you have to go to a Chinese grocers for a few niche ingredients and the jar had to be bought specially

In yet another example of the cultural hegemony enjoyed by South Korea these days, we have had a go at making kimchi.

Found this hawk trapped on the outside of our building at work. Opened the cage to help it escape and it promptly killed and ate a pigeon. Perhaps a metaphor.

Ministers to appeal against river pollution ruling won by Yorkshire anglers High court had ruled government was not meeting legal duty to clean up Costa Beck near Pickering

2. At the same time, he is appealing against a High Court ruling obliging the government to stop rivers being poisoned by human sewage. www.theguardian.com/environment/...

Labour’s agriculture plans will increase chicken waste in rivers, say campaigners Steve Reed says planning rules ‘have got in the way’ of farmers and apologises for ‘shock’ of inheritance tax change

Labour's rivers policy is unbelievable. 1. Steve Reed, the Environment Secretary, has decided our rivers are insufficiently polluted with chicken shit, so he’s loosening the rules. Never mind that it's the primary cause of rivercide in the Welsh border region. www.theguardian.com/environment/... 🧵

everyone else: Nosferatu was bad because the story is too familiar, the characters are 2D bourgeois cutouts, it doesn't transport you

me: if he's going from Transylvania to Germany, why the hell is he going by boat? Maybe there's some river that connects the Black Sea to the Baltic

End Wokeness @EndWokeness • 1h Hollywood Hills is on fire 1 0:09 From Arjan Timmermans 322 L 678 3.6K Ill 216K Nioh Berg"好 @NiohBerg • 1h Is someone setting these fires, or is it natural? Hollywood Hills suddenly caught fire also and it's spreading fast. 28

Robby Starbuck @robbystarbuck• 21m..• A new fire is raging in the Hollywood Hills and at this point I have a serious question: Who or what is starting all of these fires? It feels like these can't all be natural at this point. Has the city said anything about the origin of these fires? LIVE 9 DOWNTOWN LA X @NickSortor BREAKING NEWS T5.40167 0I0 •F| 2:40 UPDATE SOCAL'S WILDFIRE EMERGENCY From Nick Sortor 328 L. 655 2.5K Ihl 69K JohnnyG @iwontgoquietly. 39m Look, I don't care how dry it is. Fires don't just start in 70 degree weather without lightning or some other catalyst. When are we gonna admit that this is eco-terrorism? Hollywood Hills

People keep telling me that X is a better platform to follow the LA Count fires on and, well, these are the top hits on the top trending topic

On a more cheering note here are my family's dogs

I don't often get to spend Christmas in Belfast these days and I enjoyed it- but dear me, the ageing process. My parents & neighbours have an unofficial network keeping an eye on all the local residents with dementia and there doesn't seem to be very much social care. Some day soon it'll be us...

Back to London today and reunited with this little one

In case you missed it, a Telegraph columnist is calling for the UK to join a federal superstate with a single currency and free movement of people.

*playing guess the celebrity charades game*
-ex-president... had an affair with his intern
-George Clinton!

Merry Christmas from Belfast 🇬🇧

*extremely Led By Donkeys voice* back with my parents for Christmas and agog at how the wine selection in Upper Shankill Tesco is so much better than any big supermarket in England. Fiano, falanghina... recalls the Golden Age of the 2012 Olympics

Even the Labour Party want Farage to be Prime Minister

What's wrong babe, you've hardly looked at your curated edition Sleaford Mods magazine

I got it today but my win rating is only 56%. Usually foiled by some breakfast cereal or college basketball team I've never heard of

Van Gogh: worth seeing but if that's how busy it is at 5pm I dread to think what it's like at 11am

Patrick Radden Keefe's next book should be about Sam Smiths. There should be an HBO drama with Brian Cox as Humphrey.

Rumours of a one-hour queue are unfounded. Enshittification of Sam Smiths (if they could get any worse): they won't serve you upstairs at the Chandos unless you're having food. Flight of the Conchords guy at the bar seems to enjoy telling people.

Enshittification of the National Gallery: I have a ticket to enter Van Gogh at 4.30 and now I'm thinking "right, what time do I need to get in the queue? 3.30? 3?"