DeuxCentCinq

Unless I’m listening to the podcast in the car, where I can’t work out how to fast forward it. There’s a button for it in my wife’s car that isn’t there in mine.

The @cineworld.bsky.social Secret Screaming was the one film we didn’t want it to be. Booked a babysitter, out for a nice meal beforehand…only to walk out at the title screen of Good Boy. I do not want to see a dog horror film. Just zero interest. Decided to go to the pub instead. #SecretScreaming

I like to age my liquorice for about six months. Makes it super chewy and takes 3-5 mins to eat each one.

They’ve only spent £2k on their bikes? Pah. Amateurs.

do you ever think about how when you look at someone's butthole, photons are bouncing off the hole and directly into your eyes

My front door is the first one I’ve encountered that doesn’t work like that.

Tonight at @cineworld.bsky.social was Aliens - Director’s Cut. Much better. #Sequels #cineworld #aliens

How does it get in through the locked door?

The @cineworld.bsky.social secret screening 16 was Urchin. Another awards-type film that’s really not my cup of tea. Having researched what was coming out soon, I walked out as soon as I saw the title card. #urchin #urchinfilm #cineworld #secretscreening

It is in Wales. At least, I know Welsh Matthews who are called Matth.

When we moved in to our last place, we were buying off a family who’d owned it since it was built in 1899. They left us a lovely card, detailing everyone who’d lived there, and a bottle of Champagne.
We had trouble from the buyers when we sold, 8 years later. Our idea to do the same became as per.

Another tenuous “phrase”. Wtf does “dirty pool” mean? It’s not a phrase!

Wait a couple of weeks. The olive oil will turn rancid, and your shoes will reek.

I dunno. There were some proper old timers there.

Both my old schools do this. In fact my secondary school had a massive party this summer for its 900th Anniversary, inviting everyone still alive to come.

Some people just aren’t meant to work with kids, or indeed others. I consider myself a fairly introverted person, but it took lockdown for me to realise I can’t work alone. I quit my IT job and went to work in a school. Best decision ever.

I watched nearly half of the first season so far, and I don’t think Keith Harris is even in it.

“Thanks, telly. I don’t, but wife does as she’s just been looking at her phone through the whole film. You catch her up with the plot while I go for a piss. Ta.”

The really fast ones, or ones that endanger the kids going to school get dashcam footage clipped and sent to Police. From 8 reports over the last year, 4 have resulted in points and fines for the drivers.

There’s about half a mile of my commute that’s a 20 limit, as you pass two schools and a leisure centre. Unfortunately it’s also a dead straight road. At least twice a week I get someone overtaking me on it as I’m doing exactly 20 on the gps, usually on the wrong side of a keep left traffic island.

The @cineworld.bsky.social Secret Screening was I Swear. Lasted 20 mins before I walked out. I’m sure it’s a very worthy story, but it’s not exactly entertaining. More Channel 4 documentary fodder than a night out at the cinema. #cineworld #secretscreening #iswear

No, Friday is the worst day of the week. You’re absolutely knackered from working all week, and it’s tantalisingly close to the weekend, but you still have to go to work. Traffic is the worst of the week, and there’s pressure to do “something fun”. I just want to go home and go to bed.

I have never ironed a shirt. All my “non-iron” shirts look fine. All the others are wrinkled. They work.

“Oh my god, you’re not eating that, are you?!” I exclaimed.
“We had half of it yesterday, and we’re fine. Don’t worry.”
“It’s 26 years old, Grandma!”
“Do you want some?”
“….yes.”

During lockdown, my Grandma began eating through both her deep freezers. Near the bottom of one, there was a Gino Ginnelli ice cream tub with “chicken soup 11/11/94” written on it. I only found out as I was round there to rake their lawn, and she was decanting the last of it into two bowls.

I haven’t bought McVities digestives for years, because they don’t cook them long enough. Anaemic rubbish. Most supermarket own brands are better.

“Oh, they’re a bunch of liars. Let’s not use them.”

Unless the school has all the same brand boards, from the same era, it’s difficult to know which ones do what and how. But also, we offer training, and none of the teachers are ever interested. They’d rather moan “the board isn’t working” than spend 20 minutes learning how to use it to the full.

A still from the film My Girl with a subtitle of Dan Akroyd saying “especially at the drive in”.

I often get asked; “do you like all turn of the century post-hardcore?”
“Yes”, I say….

Is this still the massive problem it was 20-25 years ago? I feel young drivers have been so effectively priced out of the market that boy racers aren’t really a thing any more. I certainly don’t see them around as much I used to.