Adorable Assassin Ace 🏴‍☠️

okay babes roll your pink candles in honey and flower petals and burn it all the way before you say good night

good night!

most days I don't even meet all of the qualifications because they're not real and I'm not real either

doing yoga until i can become an orb

to sleep perchance to dream of capn crunch

and get that tattoo you were thinking about
you'll be so happy

anyway you get to make all the choices you want about your own bodies and it's really more important than ever that women stick up for each other you can be fluffy cat or you can be hairless cat or you can be like American shorthair or I kind of forgot where I was going but I love kitties. and women

sometimes me and bf Rose compare the length of our leg hair in the grocery store parking lot and point and laugh and call each other gross
being alive is absolutely hilarious and I'm here to support you and call you beautiful or gross if you want it doesn't matter You can sit with us

girls look all kinds of ways so I just want all of my girlfriends to know that if you're a girl then you're a girl and that's all there is to it and also I shave my upper lip in the shower so
there's a lot of work involved in presenting myself as a people and sometimes I don't work it's fine too

😁

It's okay see now it was a surprise

SURPRISE

things don't have to mean stuff

a picture of Chappell Roan singing, wearing a cute red and black outfit with a red studded collar, holding a pink handkerchief with red heart design, against a pink and yellow background. the headline under her from NBC reads: The Meaning Behind Chappell Roan's Rousing Hit Song "Good Luck, Babe!"

was there a question? seriously? who are we explaining this to. who is this for. HAROLD? IS THIS FOR HAROLD? HAROLD THEY'RE LESBIANS

unfortunately it looks like he is verified on Twitter which means we can never be friends

sorry Grover

our powers together would be too strong I'm sure

it's hard work being so goddamn cute

speaking of which I think I'll go give myself some bangs

It's so good I'll have another one just for you

if I make any regrettable choices I will take full responsibility

"the union does nothing for me"

and I've just started asking "how so" and most of the time my answer is "that's management. that's a management issue"

union is breaks, overtime, vacation, sick leave and pay, medical, pension, regularly scheduled raises, representation. you know. the little things

I feel fantastic

I put extra real grapefruit juice in my paloma so it's healthy

is that the dude on the cover

a copy of the movie "maid in manhattan" with Jennifer Lopez and some guy on dvd sitting in the ashtray part of a public garbage can outside in natural daylight. the DVD is surrounded by cigarette butts

you just never know when or where you will stumble across the greatest movie ever made

they do indeed; this is a person who very much WANTS to be union and we're doing our best to help!

it's so, so important! ❤️ (sorry for your loss ❤️)

Charges $147707.00 Payments/adjustments $147657.00 Balance $50.00

My mom kept her union insurance until the day she died. This was our last hospital bill:

"the union does nothing for me"

and I've just started asking "how so" and most of the time my answer is "that's management. that's a management issue"

union is breaks, overtime, vacation, sick leave and pay, medical, pension, regularly scheduled raises, representation. you know. the little things

yoikes I just had a long chat with someone not in the union who pays nearly $500 for medical insurance 😬

mine is $50

and there are people out there saying they'd like to leave the union for a couple extra bucks an hour

I don't think they really thought that through

my hand holding a cookies and cream ice cream sandwich over a cluttered wooden table with the wrapper in the background as well as a closed (and empty) fast food container

and then Agent J handed me an ice cream sandwich 🥰

screenshot of texts between me and my son Toby he sent a picture of a "fat bird"and wanted to know what it is my responses below the picture say that's a northern fucker thanks autocorrect that's a northern flicker*

I'm educating my child even while I'm working

it's such a deep breath of fresh air!! it feels surreal to hear your own story repeated back, facts intact, as if that agent had been right there beside you
the hardest fact to remember is which agent was by your side when it happened, because we all have one crystal clear connected shared mind 😂

my hand holding the second half of a carnitas torta over a cardboard takeout package sitting on a cluttered wooden table where many people gather and eat daily under florescent lighting. interior shot

gosh. DARN. I'll suffer through it