Oonagh

Nice tweet you’ve got there, be a shame if someone screengrabbed it and appended a 6/10 sarcastic rejoinder before forwarding it on WhatsApp

Figgy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars. #XmasBands

Haha.

😂 You should make your own set of crackers and put that in it.

Haha. Quite the mental image.

Immigrants have helped, improved and enriched this country more than the likes of Farage and Yaxley-Lennon could do in a thousand lifetimes, so it would be quite nice if the government didn’t pander to feeble dickheads like them with rhetoric like this.

I went to a seance yesterday. The medium said
"Knock once for yes, twice for no and nine times for the end of Eastenders."

My top 5 Spotify artists. The Cure, 9 inch nails, the Beatles, Kate bush, echo and the bunnymen

I think this is what's known as Scouse Gothic.

people have been saying “europe will be unrecognisable in twenty years!” for over fifty years and by people i mean cunts

A photo of some old fashioned weighing scales. There is a human heart in the tray. I had to change the position of the pointer to reflect the weight of a human heart. Caption, between musical notes, ‘But the very next day…’

Last Christmas I gave you my heart…

The on-hold music for Waitrose’s customer helpline is just a swan reading share prices to some brioche.

the thing all the discourse around Eurovision and Israel seems to miss is that: Russia got kicked out!! there is not only precedent, there is immediate and *still active* precedent. it’s the hypocrisy as much as anything

Nigel Farage holding a Would I Lie to You card

I once claimed that journalists can't ask me about being a massive racist because the BBC aired It Ain't Half Hot, Mum in the 70s.

She's still a space cadet, so I think it's justified.

Haha! Nice.

True. But she wouldn't look like she was holding your puppy hostage until you admitted the deep state had been behind her downfall.

Can't believe the commentator didn't say "And Australia has lost its Head." Poor show.

#TheAshes

Liz Truss sitting behind a desk, addressing the camera

"We've been trying to reach you about your extended warranty."

Rooooooot! #TheAshes

We're watching the wholesale burning of every scrap of dignity afforded to trans people in the UK, their rights, their medical services, their employment, their place within society, their bodily functions.

It is a disgrace, and a disgusting stain on the government and media of this country.

If 'virgin' means completely pure, how can there be extra-virgin olive oil?

"We meant questions about the job."

Exactly. They're protecting nobody by making people's bodies 'checkable' by the authorities on the basis of someone's suspicions.

Haha. It'll be the New Year health craze.

There can be no justice for the 97 now. #HillsboroughReport

'Viking is what they did, not who they were' is the new 'Frankenstein is the name of the doctor'.

This is a sick move, and it's just one more step in trying to drive trans people underground. The cruelty is the point.

Shame Jonathan Gullis joined Reform. He had a bright future in standing next to a pub fruit machine telling you what buttons to press.

Time for the seasonal debate:

Is “It’s a Wonderful Life” an action movie?

It's always the people whose genitals don't have to go in the blender telling people to vote for the blender party because they have some decent policies on other things.

Join in, download, get colouring!