oculisprimed

if you're not pissed off in 2026 you're not paying attention

Sack Wes Streeting and then resign Bitch

hey girls do you like my new beanie

“As an android, my positronic brain is not affected by the psychoactive chemicals in ‘marijuana’. However, I have written a new subroutine for my personality matrix that will *simulate* the effects of tetrahydrocannabinol temporarily, so that I may participate in your ‘dream blunt rotation’”

i use ubuntu because i want the linux girls to hurt me (sexually charged) but also not to have to use windows

Lock the taskbar or whatever The Clash said

I'm sorry I'm polyamorous and hot so this is a totally different world to me

Why don't you just ask him about his penis? seems like a mutual interest 😂

If you're dommey enough to pull that off then why not 🤷

I hope we're not talking about the same person :/

You have a PhD and you still can't think of a thing to ask a man from a lower class? Boys like sports and videogames if that helps lol

you have no idea, I lost a friend because I was baffled by that exact scenario. She was explaining why she wouldn't speak to her parents for years and I just didn't get it because they seemed...nice?

was a big jump scare when I realized how upper class you are tbh

shaking my head

you really are, best I've done is publish with an enemy

need someone to tell me to do my damn job because i have a staying in bed with girl addiction

Gabby :(

Yeah for real! like you can't just ask that straight out

used to hate this but love doing it now bc they will pay more attention to the question this way

I don't believe you

Definitely not

I literally did make some pancakes, now I'm soo sleepy

sort of like how they act outside of the club 💅

I lived too hard yesterday and am paying the price today

I was not there, I just love music

hard agree

starmer resign bitch

*performatively* being a white rapper is soo hard

I am so cooked chat

millennials telling you the most concerning fucking childhood memories anyone's ever heard: