Gordon Shumway

He looks like Cahir from the Witcher show

Google opinion rewards page accusing me of visiting "fat"

This isn't wrong but it sure is rude, Google

Am I actually getting old, or are the restful sleeping sounds of my elderly dog just making me tired

I was a great clips kind of guy for most of my life, but it seems like something happened post-COVID where I can't get a decent cut there. I'm talking missed patches and fundamental blending. When I'm in the chair I feel like they're the expert so I can't go "uhhhh are you doing it right??"

Dusted off the Michigan gameplan, so "yes"

I was assembling a new bookcase for my daughter and snapped one of the flimsy plastic circular cam connectors when tightening it.
I went to the basement to retrieve a metal one that I had been saving for at least ten years for just such an occasion, and saved the day.

Is a Midwestern Pope more like an "ope"

I'm not sure why this is an opportunity to tell strangers, but my 11 year old daughter decided to make drawings of Bigfoot for troop donations instead of selling cookies

My most compartmentalized defense against "but your team lost to [haughty mitten dwellers] and they tainted your season!!" is that this really did feel like a wholly separate season from that unthinkable puckering.

Followed by "it's time to check in" email and "arrive at the airport soon!!!" texts to ratchet up the work trip departure dread

Accidentally used my Wendy's drive thru pickup script at the Domino's and my embarrassment is palpable

Seems like "under 8 inches of snow" was a bad time to have the idea that I should start a geocaching hobby

An unheralded play from last night was the 5 extra yards Gee Scott crawled out of a dumpoff pass, while being tackled twice, to make it 4th and 2 at the 34 with 10 minutes left.
If it was 4th and 7, I don't think we get the QB draw that set up the TD. With a FG, 4th down strip sack doesn't happen.

In the event of an Ohio State win, the playoff has been long enough that I'm going to end up remembering it as if it were a whole separate magical season
(my own counter cope)

I'm not much of a ref complainer but I do feel like what they decide to call holding and PI fundamentally changes the makeup of each game. Strategy and execution of both teams

Hearing inflation happening inside of hand also

Fix the playoff seeding by letting the conference champ auto-byes round-robin draft their own quarter of the bracket matchups from the list of 8

Can't emotionally handle the "hang on to a lead" portion of a game

A few!

Ugh they're letting Herbstreit call this?

Every time an adult tells me goodbye and that they're headed somewhere else for the afternoon/evening, I yell "have a good night! Make good choices!" as they exit the doorway. I'm sure my co-workers aren't tired of it.

Only conference winners should be eligible to win any postseason format, and conferences should realign regionally into 8 groups to serve this function. (So easy, of course)

Conf champ games should only happen if the two top teams haven't played each other during the season yet.

This is educational for me, because I absolutely thought this and am glad to hear the contrary.
I lived in Georgia and Louisiana between 2009 and 2012 and all I ever heard was support for the conference in the bowl games. In eras where perception meant a title shot, conference hype really mattered.

I wonder where Lane Kiffin is right now

"nearly"

Fan Barometer- I like to think I'm on the more reasonable end. The boo birds don't recall how Urban would nearly lose to inferior Michigan teams and go full lizard brain in big moments.

I was a Day defender, until yesterday. You can't lose 4x in that way with those players against that team.

Mom, my favorite football podcast slash charity is bullying me again

Walking through the grocery store holding 10 items in my hands and arms, no cart or basket. Wondering if this qualifies for "dudes rock" or nah

[does something intended to get a reaction]
[gets the reaction]
"Wow, classless to react, gotta be better than that"

Ohio State is playing like it's contractually obligated to give out certain # of touches in exchange for players returning/transferring