Jepps

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 movie poster

October is for cinema

I immediately went and looked for that cat

Talking directly to a wall

Wow forget about the ants, I just hit a ground hornet nest and somehow got clear without getting stung and I attribute my swift reaction to this heavy metal preparation.

All Out War album cover

Pumping up before mowing the field filled with fire ants

Lol it’s like moving to the country!

This place is awesome because it’s like talking directly to a wall.

If a SINGLE major media org could do a story on NSPM-7, that’d be great !!!

Rick Springfield is playing a casino here soon and now during every tv commercial break I gotta hear that annoying song with my name in it.

Texas flag at a police station in New Mexico

Forgot they’ve been filming a netflix show in town and thought we got invaded by Texas for a second

Update: she had just put the batteries in the remote backwards

Wife wants me to go “fix” her aunt’s tv which is always an adventure because she’s basically a southwestern artist version of Livia Soprano.

“Sure everything is going completely insane but at least we all have lots of guns!”

Sept 30 vs Oct 1

Also funny he talked about physical fitness but not drug testing probably because he knows those guys have bloodstreams that are like 90% cocaine

He actually said “unless you want to join special forces” about the beard thing probably because he’s terrified of those dudes

Hey, so far October is looking bleak.

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Stress-Free Eric Adams Spends Day Bribing Pigeons In Central Park

Stress-Free Eric Adams Spends Day Bribing Pigeons In Central Park

Got the smallest tattoo I’ve ever had at the skatepark fundraiser and it’s so tiny and healed so fast that I forget it’s there and chuckle every time I see it.

Ask not how your Hamburger can Help you, but you can Help your Hamburger
-John Fitzgerald Kennedy

30 years of wrecking my body on a skateboard has culminated in me spraining my wrist putting away a cast iron pan.

“my boss, who has never worked a day in his life, made me fly across the country for an in-person to tell me to wash my balls”

Asked about Trump's new directive (NSPM-7) targeting "anti-Christian," "anti-capitalism" and "anti-American" speech, Sen. Elissa Slotkin says she hasn't read it.

YOU'RE ON THE HOMELAND SECURITY COMMITTEE, IT IS LITERALLY YOUR JOB TO OVERSEE THESE THINGS

The feral kitty living on our porch has a new favorite hobby of catching birds and bringing them to the front doormat for shredding and the minute I clean it up she gets mad and goes to get another one.

I hate it when TV chefs, whilst cooking with alcohol, take a little swig and beam in naughty delight at their own mischief. You're 54 years old. You can buy it legally in a shop. You want to impress me, drink the raw chicken juices you fucking coward.

this whole administration operates on underpants gnome logic. shit like

step 1: fire disloyal generals
step 2: ???
step 3: we stay winning

My buddy’s retired dad would sit in a chair all day watching victory at sea and the weather channel at absurd volumes while complaining about how McDonald’s was intentionally messing up his order. Same vibes tbh.

Water bottle with stickers

Water bottles don’t work correctly without stickers

And to my kids I leave 300 hours of cellphone footage of me missing flatground 360 flips

She Help on my Ham til I Burger