papow

It's so cool that they made the school from the social network real

If you die in sudoku you die in real life

Bacon is the strongest enchantment in the game.

Got some Jamba Juice.

(Reginald is floating in the air following a scent trail, like Toucan Sam) BEARTATO: Whoa! What are you doing? REGINALD: Barbecue law states that if I follow a scent to its grill, the griller has to give me a hot dog. C'mon! (Reginald continues floating. Beartato follows along) REGINALD: Oh boy oh boy! (They reach the source of the scent. Harrison is on fire.) REGINALD (disappointed): Awww man!

Barbecue Law

I don't _love_ that my daily commute takes me through my old college campus.

"Hey, remember how much time you wasted? Remember how you didn't do anything? Remember how your life was kind of a void for three years?"

"Yep. Time to go to work."

Like...to rent?

A trick I like to play is to be funny and make people laugh.

Oh, are you enjoying yourself? Did my joke make you laugh? The joke's on you, bub: I did it for my own joy.

Hey Google, compose a skeet to give him a hell yeah.

Rebecca Sugar
Moomin
And Annapurna?

Monday is okay now.

COMMUNITY!

Billion dollar idea: music you listen to

I was going to make a rapture joke, but I got carried away.

What's the BEST thing about having kids?

Sheesh that's impossible to answer OBVIOUSLY. But I gotta go with having a captive audience for, "Down low...too slow!"

Sometimes I think about the Zenith TV we had growing up. That fucker had a cool Z.

Hello operator, I'm looking for a bed and breakfast? Oh, no air, thank you. I'll bring my own.

Merriam-Webster Merriam-Webster @merriam-webster.c... • 17h enshittification noun | when a digital platform is made worse for users, in order to increase profits ... Gold Yoshi @goldyoshi.bsky.social [Screenshot of the enshittification page on Merriam Websters website. It says where does enshittification come from and the entire page is covered in ads]

Dreading the hip new Austin Powers: I've lost my emojo, baby!

Best Friend

Lots of songs can do that, of course, but tonight's was open.spotify.com/track/5miGvo...

One of my favorite feelings is when I'm listening to a "favorites/feel something" playlist of mine and I'm desperate to 💜 the song I'm listening to again.

I can't! It's already on the playlist!

I need a 💜 counter.

My current tinfoil hat is that Tesla was doing too good a job making progress with mainstreaming electric vehicles, so "competing interests" paid them off to sour EVs.

This is not true, Tesla isn't some precious company that deserves defense. But lord, is everything associated with them just dumb.

I don't think there's a more embarrassing sound than the "you buzzed in and ran out of time" sound from Jeopardy!

Are they all sleeping on smoky poker tables?

...are they cuddling?

How do I know I'm not rich? I have no fucking clue what "the club" is.

Hey, the common loon called. Yeah, it was hauntingly beautiful

Get out of my mailbox

WHO CLEARED THAT!?

If film is the most powerful medium, how come my house is still full of ghosts, ghouls, et al.?