Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab

I'm going to win.

Absolutely! We have been trying to finalize a date for the next Twin Cities Lunacy.

SCREAMS

A photo of four 5ml amber apothecary labels posed on a scrap of red fabric in front of a wooden window frame. In the background, through the window frame, potted plants are visible. The perfume labels read: UNQUIET SLUMBERS, CATHERINE, HEATHCLIFF, and LET ME IN.

Four 5ml perfume oils to launch the series! The CATHERINE and HEATHCLIFF fragrances were formulated to be worn layered with each other, but can also be enjoyed as standalone scents.

WHAT INDEED

And we're live! Partnering with the British Library is lifetime achievement stuff, we're very excited. 🥲

blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-cate...

A poster image for BPAL's Wuthering Heights perfume series, featuring one of Percy Tarrant's 1924 illustrations depicting a female character being violently seized by Heathcliff, all faces omitted by the framing and text which reads: "Wuthering Heights: fragrances by black phoenix alchemy lab. An aromatic adaptation created in collaboration with The British Library." A caption on the illustration reads: "IT WAS TOO LATE: HEATHCLIFF HAD ALREADY CAUGHT HOLD OF HER"

We might as well obnoxiously tease this fragrance partnership while we're waiting for it to go live in our shop 🎭

#WutheringHeights

sure you might have seen my name in the big pdf that got released titled “list of draculas currently operating in the united states.” here’s why that’s NOT a big deal:

A screencap from our email unsubscribe reports, including one from someone named Lisa that includes the comment: "Can't take anymore of your political bullshit", but we scribbled in a comma an then added "VALENTINE <3"

And if you like, you may sign up to receive our emails in the future: eepurl.com/CsjP9

We've got plenty of room, now that Lisa has unsubscribed! (We turned her commentary into a Valentine too) 🥰

It's that "silence, brand" meme with a scary crab shooting lasers out of its eyes, but we crossed out "brand" and scribbled in "Valentine", tee-hee

If you're not signed up to receive our emails, then you missed yesterday's unhinged love letter to our perfume fanbase. We even created an anticipatory Valentine in response to it! 💌

Actually tho, you can read it here: us4.campaign-archive.com?u=50266fc02a...

Products Browse all products from Girthofvenus.

Quite a few (decidedly NSFW) @girthofvenus.bsky.social artworks available as prints here: girthofvenus.bigcartel.com/products

Artwork by Girth of Venus depicting a Nutcracker posing against a winter wonderland backdrop with a castle seen in negative silhouette in the far distance. Despite a wooden nutcracker-style head, the figure has an apparently human body and ballet-style military costume... which is missing a key area, right there in the front. Oh, and there is also a sword!

A few of these are part of the recent Yule series and will be added to the GoV section later on: blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-cate...

We created perfumes with @girthofvenus.bsky.social so we could tap into that heady, swoony Valentine's Day feeling year round. Erotes and lupercalians, take note! 💌

blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-cate...

You do it to build public pressure on other members of Congress to support it, which is the first step of achieving it. Avoiding mention of it and helping maintain the veneer of normal government functioning (when in reality we're in crisis) does the opposite

When we’re not yelling at people to call their reps, we also sell fragrance. 🐍

Here are fifteen lavishly scented bath oils, each more enticing than the last:

blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-cate...

You’re describing an emergency. The world is also watching you and waiting for you to do something.

Are you going to establish an eviction moratorium? Rent is due today.

Moments from Něco z Alenky aka Alice (1988).

Listen to our episode about the film: linktr.ee/onceuponavhs

No.

Thank God feminism was unnecessary

The MELANIA movie poster, a black and white photo of the First Lady sitting on a chair staring meanly out at the viewer. An email from 2002 has been superimposed on the poster that reads: Dear G! How are you? Nice story about JE in NY mag. You look great on the picture. I know you are very busy flying all over the world. How was Palm Beach? I cannot wait to go down. Give me a call when you are back in NY. Have a great time! Love, Melania."

We should probably update Melania's movie poster to include this loving email she sent convicted sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell in 2002, uncovered in yesterday’s file release.

Ideal weekend viewing/listening double feature 🐇

Bloomberg headline: "Nvidia Halts Plan to Invest $100 Billion in OpenAI, WSJ says"

🕯️ 🕯️
🕯️pop 🕯️
🕯️ 🕯️

Good news! Our site is now completely non-operational until 5pm Eastern 🤩

It's that stupid Vince McMahon reaction meme, showing him having increasingly dramatic reactions to the phrases: "NO SHOPPING, NO WORK, ABOLISH ICE, RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES"

Due to technical difficulties, our website is currently online. We apologize for this convenience! We're currently investigating the matter and hope to restore dysfunction ASAP. 🙌

#ICEOUT #NATIONALSHUTDOWN

Girl, if you really had a problem with “child pornography” you’d get the fuck off of Twitter

Dab a bit of our GOBLIN perfume oil behind each ear, and you’ll be instantly inspired to alter street signs, shake fruit from your neighbor’s trees, and hide your roommate’s car keys. Black coconut, gnarly patchouli, and sweet benzoin.

blackphoenixalchemylab.com/shop/general...

Seriously this is how we found it out it's #goblinweek??