just here for the food 🍉

the "dudes rock" guy from this olympics just dropped

@jon_bois a football player carries the ball to the 49 yard line, then the 50 yard line. however, after taking another step forward, he finds to his astonishment that he is once again at the 49 yard line. but how can this be? this is the grand riddle of football

orange cat on his blankey with his paw over his face

EVERYONE: be quiet. the baby is sleeping

A post on threads from user stephens_bens. It reads 'I'll always remember an interview with Steve Buscemi on Bulleye, Jesse Thorn asked him "As an actor with many decades of varied and outstanding roles across your career, does it ever bother you that one of the things you will most be remembered for is a 3-second gif in which you're wearing a backwards baseball cap and carrying a skateboard?" And without missing a beat, Buscemi replied "I'm carrying *two* skateboards." And you know what? He is.' Below that is a screen cap of Buscemi's famous "fellow kids" moment.

I never noticed this either.

america really is the main character of the world, but in the twitter way

Explaining to my husband what long Furbys are and it conjured this classic from JP Brammer

Community Leather Coat Drive Helps Bad Boys In Need https://theonion.com/community-leather-coat-drive-helps-bad-boys-in-need/

Grocery store sign of bagel that reads: pick your own. Part of the sign is obscured to look like it reads: fuck your own

Relax, bread department

sabrina carpenter singing islands in the stream w the muppets has healed me in ways i did not know i needed

WHEN I WAS
A YOUNG FED
MY CO
TOOK ME INTO THE CITY
TO SEE AN APARTMENT RAID

HE SAID SON WHEN
YOU GROW UP
WILL YOU BE
A KILLER OF CIVILIANS
A BEATER OF YOUR WIFE

HE SAID WILL YOU
DEFEAT THEM
WILL STANCIL
AND ALL THE NONBELIEVERS
IN THEIR HONDA FITS

PSA

Photo of 7 year old Diana Crespo sitting with her parents at a table in a restaurant. Her dad is giving a thumbs up.

The public made noise for Liam Ramos and it got him released from Dilley.

Now we must make noise for 7 year old Diana Crespo.

Her parents were taking her for emergency medical care when ICE grabbed them, and she’s rotting in the camp sick and exposed to measles.

Get them out!

somebody’s sweet plums are crowding my icebox

somebody’s cold plums are giving me chills

What if it's another ace attorney game?

worth noting that the second rich people stopped being afraid of mobs tearing them limb from limb, they stopped building libraries and opera houses and stuff and started ripping the copper wiring out of the walls of society instead

Starting with a biography of Toussaint Louverture! Been meaning to learn more about the Haitian Revolution for ages

Broken Social Scene And Metric Announce New Albums, Joint Tour With Stars Canadian indie rock is alive and well: Broken Social Scene and Metric are announcing new albums as well as a joint summer tour with Stars. The bands have shared members over the years, including Emily...

It's Canadian indie rock Christmas, as Broken Social Scene and Metric have announced new albums and a tour with Stars

A Day for Gaza Today, The Nation is turning over its website exclusively to stories from Gaza and its people. This is why.

Media coverage of Gaza has plummeted. So today on @thenation.com, we're doing something pretty special: we're only running pieces by people in and from Gaza.

We're calling it "A Day for Gaza." You can find links to all of the incredible pieces here. Please read! www.thenation.com/article/worl...

It's pretty amazing to me the amount of shit that apparently you can Just Do as an NYC mayor. It makes basically every other American politician look like an incompetent loser.

What do you mean there was just a button that reversed wage theft? Why wasn't and isn't everyone hitting it all the time??

Man Who Thought Fleetwood Mac’s ‘The Chain’ Was Over In For Thrill Of His Fucking Life https://theonion.com/man-who-thought-fleetwood-macs-the-chain-was-over-in-for-thrill-of-his-fucking-life/

Whenever you see a story about how liberals aren't making their conservative peers feel welcome enough, this is who they're talking about.

DOCTOR: I told him he needed to get out to a show, that was how he would cure his depression.

CHOTINER: So you learned this technique in school?

DR: No, not— listen it was good advice. Pagliacci was in town.

C: Right. Is it standard to give advice before learning a patient’s name?

DR: Now look

ICE claim that a man shattered his skull running into wall triggers tension at a Minnesota hospital Nurses in Minneapolis doubted federal immigration officers' claims about a Mexican immigrant's severe injuries.

"Four hours after his arrest, he was taken to a hospital emergency room in Edina with swelling and bruising around his right eye and bleeding. A CT scan revealed at least eight skull fractures and life-threatening hemorrhages in at least five areas of his brain..."

apnews.com/article/immi...

The Grammys.

Tumblr post: "there's something endlessly hilarious to me about the phrase 'hotly debated' in a academic context. Like I just picture a bunch of nerds at podiums and one's like 'of course there was a Paleolithic bear cult in northern Eurasia' and another one just looks him in the eye and says "I'll kill you in real life, kevin". Reply post is a screenshot of some printed text that says "the Milton scholars screamed and argued about how the serpent was supposed to move before it crawled on its belly. Dr. Matthews, enraged that Dr. Goldstein could believe the serpent bounced around on the coiled end of its tail, flipped over the conference table. 'Satan is not a fucking pogo stick!' he howled.

here's my entry!! #Comics4Liam

WHAT.

in 2018!!!! can we please stop giving her plausible deniability for being one of the most disgusting humans alive

It’s frankly insulting that the worlds worst people weren’t meeting in a command center in a volcano wearing ceremonial robes but were all emailing on Hotmail accounts like “want 2 atrosity? With wemen?”