Mat Colegate

The audio equivalent of driving a Ford Probe through the Euro tunnel.

YouTube video by dansolo21 Ghetto Puppets - My Mind Is Playing Tricks On Me

It's all been downhill for the internet since this, hasn't it?

A bumper crop this evening, it seems! Next time.

Tonight! Fellows of London, attend!

Both great in Briz on Wednesday. And I'm playing New Rivs tonight an'all if you fancy a double whammy.

We're all just watching Rick Stein on the off chance he'll burn himself on a pan and start swearing up a storm aren't we? Like watching Formula One and hoping there'll be a crash.

As sad as I am about the death of Udo Kier I take comfort in the fact that in his back garden he kept a lone carousel horse that he called 'Max Von Sydow'. Rejoice, then. We cannot hope to trap such greatness in our fallen world.

The film of the same name might be even better.

Much as I enjoy Race Across the World, I can't help but think it would be much better if John Hannah narrated it in character as Batiatus from Spartacus: Blood and Sand. "Now these limp f*cking boy-lovers must make their way across the Gulf of f*cking Mexico..."

I'm playing New River Studios on the 28th of November as part of this excellent line up. First show in a while, and, to be honest, I play so irregularly nowadays that it may be the last show in a while as well. Hopefully see some of you down there.

YouTube video by Batmitey Swamp Thing opening theme

Sorry guys, Swampy's got you all licked...
youtu.be/3H5zXh6MVvg?...

They all are! Even the ones who I used to think were alright, like Bill Murray, are portrayed as jealous, whining - and, it must be said, shockingly unprofessional - children.

Reading 'Wild and Crazy Guys: How the Comedy Mavericks of the '80s Changed Hollywood Forever' by Nick De Semlyen, and I know it's not a new observation, but my God comedians are the most needy, insecure, desperate people on earth aren't they?

Rick Moranis seems alright though.

You could just WATCH THE FUCKING FILMS. That the horror critical establishment is only now waking up to the fact that The Terrifier films just might be a tiny bit misogynistic is astounding. You're a critic. Don't get distracted by ‘strong female characters’ in angel wings and do your job properly.

I've had it in my 'to listen' pile since it dropped, but haven't had a chance yet. I'll get to it forthwith.

Guy Fawkes' signature before and after starring in Panto season with John Barrowman.

Here are the 25 best pieces of Horror Fiction of the 21st century so far... | The Quietus Welcome, dear readers to Halloween, when in the UK and US children dress as their favourite fictional horror characters (and some, misguidedly, as serial killers) to walk door-to-door asking neighbour...

Really chuffed that I got asked to contribute to this. Some great books here, some startling omissions (I feel like I have to personally apologise to Ramsey Campbell, but that's how these sorts of things go) and a huge backlog of stuff I need to get familiar with. Truly, the horror never ends.

Number one in a series I'm calling "Late Night Pictures of Richard Lynch".

I actually meant presenter Matt Tebbitt, who always gets good and loose when they have cocktails in the studio. At points by the end of the episode he appeared to be having some difficulty speaking. I was also drunk though.

Also, Matt is shit faced.

Watching actors 'being themselves' on light entertainment can be quite something, and Bryan Cranston is delivering a masterclass of the form on Saturday Kitchen this week. A luvvie of stratosphericproportions.

Seeing as this is where everyone hangs out these days: I'm going to be having drinks at New River on Thursday afternoon before checking this lot out, if anyone's around for a bevvy?

We got this in the record shop where I worked. People coming in, shoving their phones into the staff's faces and acting with absolute incredulity when asked to stop. "But what about the exposure?" As if that justified acting like a complete dick.

YouTube video by Official William Shatner Page Ponder The Mystery - Official Video

William Shatner turning to the camera and whispering the word "depravity" is my new spirit animal.

What's the deal with that duck face thing that Christian Bale does?

I'm calling this one "Childhood's End (Hands of the Pink Ripper)"

Don't say you haven't been warned.

I love that "In fact". Cracks me up every time. "ACTUALLY..."

Landscape Suicide (1986) James Benning's slow paced meditation on American murder is a sobering antidote to Netflix's new Ed Gein show.

This week on The Savage Beast I take a look at James Benning's delve into the world of true crime, 'Landscape Suicide'. A meditation on the environments that spawn murderers, through landscape, experimental film techniques and painstaking reconstruction. thesavagebeast.substack.com/p/landscape-...

Can anyone identify this font please?