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Joe "has always been the caretaker" Humphrey

@joehumphrey.bsky.social

Writer, artist https://linktr.ee/Joehumphrey joehumphrey.com

1,205 Followers  |  2,938 Following  |  5,313 Posts  |  Joined: 19.04.2023  |  1.9793

Latest posts by joehumphrey.bsky.social on Bluesky

dead lady rising from grave, looking at you lustily. get ready or get ate

dead lady rising from grave, looking at you lustily. get ready or get ate

Beware the horny undead.
#zombie

12.12.2025 11:02 β€” πŸ‘ 35    πŸ” 9    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Oh dang I thought this was todays but it's actually last week's that I missed. Oh well!

12.12.2025 13:34 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

It's #lesficfri! The word today is "Sorry"

After a big fight with her husband, Winnie has gone to Deborah's house for support. I wish I had something more on topic thematically, but almost all of my sorry stuff revealled too much in the way of spoilers

12.12.2025 13:31 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

Thanks!

12.12.2025 08:43 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Post your most popular art from Twitter

Probably these two, because they got a little help

12.12.2025 08:38 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 1

Lol

12.12.2025 02:35 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
Lisa Kudrow and Teri Garr on Friends

Lisa Kudrow and Teri Garr on Friends

In the show Friends, Phoebe confronts her birth mother, played by Teri Garr, surprising her at home. Her mother, thinking Phoebe is an intruder, grabs a coat hanger, to fend off her unwanted child.

I'd like to think the symbolism was intentional.

I've been thinking about this for decades btw.

12.12.2025 02:25 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Shit that what my book is about

12.12.2025 02:17 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Funny Stephen King is always describing peoples scrotums responding to situations. It's so odd. I mean nutsacks DO sometimes respond to stuff, but he doesn't check in with people's nipples or labia or anything.

The Man in Black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger felt his butthole clench up.

11.12.2025 14:50 β€” πŸ‘ 7    πŸ” 2    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I had a dream that the Trump administration sold Sesame Street and sold all the monsters and Muppets.

I was on a team that was trying to get them all back in time before these "private collectors" started pimping them out to rich weirdos.

I had a dream about rescuing Muppets from sexual slavery.

11.12.2025 14:44 β€” πŸ‘ 5    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

In fiction generally for me, I seem to like an Apprentice/Master pairing. I suppose that's kind of natural in vampire stories, but that's probably one of the reasons I like vampire stories.

In my smut atm I have an experienced older woman with a younger (well 30) less adventurous woman

#Smutcember

11.12.2025 14:32 β€” πŸ‘ 10    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
28 Years Later | Priscilla Page Get more from Priscilla Page on Patreon

I wrote about 28 Years Later

18.08.2025 17:51 β€” πŸ‘ 717    πŸ” 165    πŸ’¬ 46    πŸ“Œ 68

Sometimes when I am by myself I talk in the cadence of Mitch Hedberg and I find it very. amusing to. do. so.

Don't bother ringing it up, it's for a DUCK!

11.12.2025 03:22 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Remember back in the nineties when people talked about condoms all the time. Like so many discussions about condoms. I mean I know why, but it's weird to me that it was such a big part of the conversation and now I almost never hear about condoms anymore. They're just a medical product now.

11.12.2025 03:18 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Now I'm somehow on vegan-animals-being-treated-badly-tok wtf

11.12.2025 02:50 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

How did I get on Gross Eye Stuff Tok?

11.12.2025 02:30 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

People keep wondering why they're going after Venezuela. It's because they want to do regime change and control its oil, then use a big tract of land there to keep a tax free "network state" that looks like Dubai but operates like Rhodesia. They are saying this out loud! Believe them!

10.12.2025 18:57 β€” πŸ‘ 25453    πŸ” 7773    πŸ’¬ 658    πŸ“Œ 292

I like to think so! But at the same time, I also have like, ten WIPs with a few thousand words in each. So ADHD kinda wins sometimes too and I jump around in my process, which is barely a process as it is. It's chaos in here.

11.12.2025 01:38 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

If I were in Pluribus, I would do all kinds of crazy shit like live in Disneyland, having my own Arby's, and build me a house that has the internal structure of the Enterprise D. Like a space hotel, with a ten forward and a bridge where I watch TV and play video games with Bruce Springsteen.

11.12.2025 01:36 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Wake Up Dead Man

11.12.2025 01:29 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0
General Han Solo peaks around a tree, gun raised, about to step on a branch while storm troopers bumble about in the background.

General Han Solo peaks around a tree, gun raised, about to step on a branch while storm troopers bumble about in the background.

Learned recently that this guy got published and so I can share it.

General Han Solo for Star Wars Legion. Β©LFL Β©AMG
AD Preston Stone

I remember fighting with the foreground ferns, and then they ended up being my favorite part of the painting πŸ˜‚

11.12.2025 01:26 β€” πŸ‘ 74    πŸ” 12    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I don't like when you go to a concert and the singer tells us what the next song is. It's like, play it and let me get excited when I hear it! No spoilers, Eddie Vedder.

11.12.2025 01:16 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

That's not to say I don't have specific notes I want to include there. Those generally don't change much. But all the filler notes, I'm open.

11.12.2025 01:12 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

here here

11.12.2025 01:08 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Definitely! I'm a pantser all the way, so my stories evolve at every step of the process tbh. I'm always learning new things and adjusting the text to accommodate that info.

11.12.2025 01:05 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0
Micky from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure leaning out of a prison bus saying "Action packed Pee-Wee!"

Micky from Pee-Wee's Big Adventure leaning out of a prison bus saying "Action packed Pee-Wee!"

11.12.2025 01:00 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
Sofia Vegara wrestling meme. She's in front of a bunch of men on the ground in a wrestling ring and smiling. The caption says "I think they r dead"

Sofia Vegara wrestling meme. She's in front of a bunch of men on the ground in a wrestling ring and smiling. The caption says "I think they r dead"

11.12.2025 00:55 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
Ripley and Jones

Ripley and Jones

11.12.2025 00:53 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0
A drawing of a Jack pine cone that has been opened by fire, which is necessary for the species propagation. There is an inner glow to the natural red and orange markings that suggests remaining ember glow. The Roman numerals XVI are underneath to symbolize the Tower tarot card,  a. symbol of the destruction necessary in order to properly rebuild.

A drawing of a Jack pine cone that has been opened by fire, which is necessary for the species propagation. There is an inner glow to the natural red and orange markings that suggests remaining ember glow. The Roman numerals XVI are underneath to symbolize the Tower tarot card, a. symbol of the destruction necessary in order to properly rebuild.

The Tower - (P. banksiana)

01.01.2024 20:16 β€” πŸ‘ 478    πŸ” 104    πŸ’¬ 10    πŸ“Œ 0

The #WIPSnips word for December 10th is "pipe"

#WriteSky #WritingPrompts #WritingCommunity

I've shared this scene before but it's a good use of "pipe" so here it is again!

11.12.2025 00:48 β€” πŸ‘ 15    πŸ” 2    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

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