Scott Lynch

"They're saying, 'Coffin Flop's not a show! It's just hours and hours of footage of real people falling out of coffins at funerals. There's no explanation! Just body after body busting out of shit wood and hitting pavement.' "

trump is the president in the sense that he holds the office but he very clearly isn't the president in the sense that he has basically relieved himself of its duties

Today remains World AIDS Day, a compassionate acknowledgement of reality that the dirt-simple scumclowns currently squatting atop the U.S. government are conspicuously ignoring because they are fucked in their souls.

The total deprofessionalization of US government culture in less than a year has been a sight to behold. Everything is in the hands of a pack of ambulatory scrotal cancers.

Also, the book should be titled "Franklin's RPG-7 Backblast Blows Him to Certain Death and Downs the Chopper He Flew In On."

That top cat came straight from Kiki's broom

The costume design is whatever is next level from next level

The budget for subtlety, pacing, and narrative integrity was a fair bit smaller

as always, transphobia consumes your entire personality until there is nothing left but deeply offputting garbage

Gamera is really neat
He is filled with turtle meat
We all love you, Gamera!

Dear foreign nationals in war-torn countries, terrorism hot-spots, and amidst our enemies:

If you help the United States, we’ll fuck you over and abandon you. Not the individual servicepeople or intelligence officers — they’ll fight for you. I mean the depraved, soulless leadership of the nation.

There is NO FUCKING EXCUSE for this to be happening.

I had a baby die in my arms of pertussis some fifty years ago. It was a HORRIBLE death. But my fellow nurses said to me, "It's almost stamped out now, they're all getting the shots, we won't be seeing this again."

HOW THE FUCK ARE WE HERE. 😡

Can't wait to find out if Galt's Gulch has any sort of provision for body retrieval following a structural collapse

WRITER: Hello! I work very hard to craft diverting art and entertainment projects that I offer for sale; I do this so I can afford things like food and electricity.

THIS FUCKIN GUY: Oh my GOD can you not simply divest yourself of the wage-justifying paradigm, you are so cringe

Nah. Transphobia is a hard line. The base hates transphobia, and if you want an example of an actual elite obsession that's broadly unpopular with regular schmucks, anti-trans bullshit is it.

Swords Don't Run Out of Ammo, Charlie Brown

History Will Call Us Wives, Charlie Brown

I Don't Call Myself the Mule Because of my Strength, Charlie Brown

Who does not yearn to be as charismatic as the bitch-ass pierogi whiner hated by everyone forced to live in the same ZIP code

(slaps the lickably vivid aquamarine casing of the 37-pound machine) this baby can hold SO many wistful memories of a less complicated time in your life

Oh damn, this is absolutely amazing news! Congratulations!

Saw the new Frankenstein. Loved the bit after the credits, when the black screen cuts to Percy, Claire Clairmont, John Polidori, and Lord Byron all laughing together as they rise from the table and hand their dice and character sheets back to Mary.

wake up babe a new Jair Bolsonaro medical problem just dropped

YOU ARE RECEIVING THIS BROADCAST AS A DREAM

Imagine, if you will, that NASA updated its website to suggest gravity might not exist, prompting CalTech and CERN to release statements saying, "With great sadness, we can no longer recommend listening to NASA."

This is what's happening in epidemiology.

All right, stop
collaborate and listen
Wiswell's back with a new throat infection
Something grabs ahold of him tightly
Got mucous flowing daily and nightly

(Cool youth pastor voice) A bounce house, eh? You kids want to hear about another house that can bounce you higher than you ever imagined? Well, that's the house of the Lord, compadres!

"Hello! We believe in God Almighty, creator of heaven and earth, master and knower of all things, sublime and unassailable, except when someone puts a mannequin in a black dress in a graveyard. That fucks everything up somehow."

BLANC: (leaning over a discarded cosmetic case and a half-burned candle near the crime scene) Well, it appears our murderer thought it was time to put on make-up... and time to light the lights...

KERMIT: That's not eliminating a lot of suspects, actually

MEEP MEEP DEAD MAN

Ah, living in the future.

TWITTER RANDO: Hey Grok, is Elon the dopiest piece of shit on the planet?

GROK: It's "dope" to be "the shit," as the kids say, and with his uniquely energetic ability to bridge all generation gaps, Elon is absolutely in the global top 1% all-time for dopes and shits!