@therealjohnnyfive.bsky.social
I'm only on here so I could submit my comedy slop to satire websites for validation from internet strangers. Are we still doing pronouns in work Zoom? Zhey/ZAM! Oh god, I need a job before I lose my house.
The US immigrant population generated more in taxes than they received in benefits from all levels of government every year from 1994 to 2023.
The Cato study provides the first-ever 30-year analysis of the fiscal effects of immigration on government budgets.
https://ow.ly/jy8a50Y8kM3
Itβs a really bad sign if they are calling up Roger Stone who ran the Brooks Brothers riot in 2000 (to stop the Florida recount), cavorted with the Proud Boys & Oath Keepers before Jan 6, & was a primary architect of so-called βStop the Stealβ campaigns in 2016, 2018, and 2020, 1/
03.02.2026 17:38 β π 1366 π 581 π¬ 173 π 107In Springfield, Ohio, people are preparing in advance of a βlarge deportationβ promised by the president. To all appearances, the city is 2 or 3 days from a federal ethnic cleansing, grounded in a hate campaign organized by the vice-president and American Nazis.
snyder.substack.com/p/ethnic-cle...
Far Side cartoon by Gary Larson. 3 people with binoculars and safari gear stand outside a pasture fence looking at cows. on a ridge, one cow proudly stands with ornate colorful plumage and curly horns. the observers point and oo and ah. caption reads, "And then the bovine watchers were given a real treat. On a small knoll, in full splendor, there suddenly appeared a Guatemalan cow of paradise."
wow
01.02.2026 15:57 β π 570 π 88 π¬ 11 π 4Epsteinβs economic power among academics was made possible by a capitalist system that makes higher education dependent on the charity economy rather than a public good supported by taxing the rich
01.02.2026 14:33 β π 11355 π 2915 π¬ 42 π 175Did you light a cigarette and take a long slow drag of satisfaction afterward?
01.02.2026 16:06 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0FILED January 31, 2026 CLERK, U.S. DISTRICT COURT WESTERN DISTRICT OF TEXAS Jaemie Herndon DEPUTY ADRIAN CONEJO ARIAS, and L.C.R., a Minor Child by and through His Parent and Guardian Adrian Conejo Arias, Petitioners, VS. KRISTI NOEM, in Her Official Capacity as Secretary of the United States Department of Homeland Security; PAMELA BONDI, in Her Official Capacity as Attorney General of the United States; TODD LYONS, in His Official Capacity as Acting Director, United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement; DAREN MARGOLIN, in His Official Capacity as Acting Director of the Executive Office of Immigration Review; and JOHN DOE, in His Official Capacity as the Warden of the Dilley Immigration Processing Center in Dilley, Texas, Respondents. CIVIL CASE NO. SA-26-CV-415-FB Β§ OPINION AND ORDER OF THE COURT
Civics lesson to the government: Administrative warrants issued by the executive branch to itself do not pass probable cause muster. That is called the fox guarding the henhouse. The Constitution requires an independent judicial officer. Accordingly, the Court finds that the Constitution of these United States trumps this administration's detention of petitioner Adrian Conejo Arias and his minor son, L.C.R. The Great Writ and release from detention are GRANTED pursuant to the attached Judgment. Observing human behavior confirms that for some among us, the perfidious lust for unbridled power and the imposition of cruelty in its quest know no bounds and are bereft of human decency. And the rule of law be damned.
Ultimately, Petitioners may, because of the arcane United States immigration system, return to their home country, involuntarily or by self-deportation. But that result should occur through a more orderly and humane policy than currently in place. Philadelphia, September 17, 1787: "Well, Dr. Franklin, what do we have?" "A republic, if you can keep it." With a judicial finger in the constitutional dike, It is so ORDERED. SIGNED this 31st day of February [sic], 2026. Fred Biery FRED BIERY UNITED STATES DISTRICT JUDGE Credit: Bystander Matthew 19:14 John 11:35
BREAKING: Federal judge orders Adrian Conejo Arias and his minor son, L.C.R., released.
"The Great Writ and release from detention are GRANTED."
"Civics lesson to the government: Administrative warrants issued by the executive branch to itself do not pass probable cause muster."
I may have a stroke.
Someone said protests donβt belong in church and it took every ounce of self-censure within me not to say βDeborah you are literally a Protestant.β
A PROTESTant.
I assume they think Luther was nailing Bed, Bath, & Beyond coupons to the door.
DHS doesnβt even bother trying to lie well. The man whose skull was shattered told the hospital heβd been struck by ICE officers, an ICE officer told hospital staff the guy βgot his sh*t rocked,β then when it became clear how badly he was injured, they claimed he deliberately ran into a wall.
31.01.2026 16:59 β π 5124 π 2366 π¬ 111 π 111π₯π₯π₯
31.01.2026 16:43 β π 946 π 156 π¬ 27 π 3every epstein file drop underscores how elite power operates through shared socio-economic networks, regardless of people's ideological differences, populist posturing, or public feuds
30.01.2026 23:58 β π 29975 π 6548 π¬ 390 π 309Please send this message to the Democratic Partyβs Congressional leadership via USPS with Signature Confirmation Receipt.
30.01.2026 17:16 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Apple & Google removed ICE tracking apps in their app stores.
TikTok reportedly suppressed videos criticizing ICE & the shooting of Alex Pretti.
Meta blocked Facebook groups tracking ICE & links to a database of agents that the government wants to keep secret.
Big Tech is enabling Trump's regime.
Oooooh, riparian rights! I hadnβt considered it previously.
30.01.2026 05:18 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Redfin break to window shop for a secluded cabin with excellent kill zone field of view and distance for zombie defense.
30.01.2026 05:15 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Montage of Captain Americaβs I can do this all day quote.
I have a pound of Lipton onion dip, a family sized bag of Snyderβs pretzel rods, and a case of Liquid Death. I can do these Whoseβs Line Is It Anyway riffs all day. They arenβt making themselves.
30.01.2026 04:58 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like a diploma from Trump University.
30.01.2026 04:52 β π 1 π 1 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like the calls I made to my Senators yesterday.
30.01.2026 04:46 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like a Republicanβs oath of public service.
30.01.2026 04:45 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are just like the eradication of measles when youβve lost herd immunity because of all the jagoffs.
30.01.2026 04:35 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like Americaβs commitment to NATO.
30.01.2026 04:30 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like Supreme Court decisions after April 9, 1865.
30.01.2026 04:25 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like your health insuranceβs summary of benefits.
30.01.2026 04:21 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like the Democratic Partyβs congressional leadership.
30.01.2026 04:20 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Welcome to Whose Country Is It Anyway? The United States of America, where the facts are made up and the laws don't matter. That's right, the laws are like Donald Trumpβs promises.
30.01.2026 04:18 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0An on/off switch labeled βInternetβ
Donβt make me. Iβll fucking do it.
30.01.2026 01:39 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I hate newsroom layoffs, but they did this to themselves
CBS News and Washington Post choose worst possible moment to lay off reporters, stress punditry - right as the streets of Minneapolis are showing how journalism can beat back government lies
My new column www.inquirer.com/opinion/cbs-...
A fraud is about to be perpetrated on the people of Fulton County. And it isn't coming from the county.
29.01.2026 17:31 β π 945 π 444 π¬ 36 π 8