Mr Nimmo

The only thing that the entire UK have been able to agree on is an extremely recent collective "fuck that guy".

When there are no consequences, as has been repeatedly demonstrated, nothing is illegal.

Aw come on, Home Alone was iconic

The First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence?

Jim doing a fantastic stretch.

I don't like to brag but I do think our cat Jim is probably better at stretching than virtually any other cat in Britain.

She does it all the time, and it's predatory as fuck.

Extra fortune cookies sounds like a win to me

Sounds good to me, let's do that.

When he says French films, he means The Transporter starring Jason Statham as Jason Statham, doing Jason Statham stuff.

Damn, I had other plans for my week off work.

I feel like that colour is not available in my region

Luckily we know how to revive them

I'm a member of a gaming forum that recently had to suspend new memberships because of the UK's ridiculously poorly-written and draconian Online Safety Act.

You know what I would really hate? If Labour were to tax billionaires, lift the 2-child cap, stop being racist fucks, and bring water and energy companies into public ownership. I would be absolutely DISGUSTED if they did all that, and they would all be very difficult decisions for Starmer to make.

Replace any word in a Star Trek title with "knob."

Spock's Knob

Hopefully one that is soon to be divorced, with a restraining order against him.

Clearly they missed the bit where Gunny got shot to death by Leonard.

The only thing Kier is taking on with Reform is their characteristics.

Timeline cleanser 🐈

That is genius!

From this week’s Beano.

Well don't I feel stupid

I'm willing to bet that the kind of people who push these things probably don't get many visitors. At least not social ones.

Maintaining the 2-child benefit cap is "addressing the needs of families and kids" is it? Cutting PIP is "addressing the needs of the unwell" is it? Forcing these people into deeper poverty is helping how, exactly?

Remind me why he's not rotting in prison for war crimes again?

Dawn Foster: I knew Wes when I was a student and he was the NUS president - always been a right wing lickspittle cunt

It's days like this that I remember the words of the late Dawn Foster.

I tried searching Wikipedia for Doors, but it just wanted to tell me about some bloke called Jim

I have never once heard it called "Itchy Dabber", and I'm from Durham

I shall grab my picnic blanket, and meet you at the Stadium of Light?

That would have been disastrous, and I would have had very strong opinions about that. Therefore it's only right that I back Sir Michael to be president of FIFA