Andrew Farmer

Why Must Every Haunted House Feature a Disgusting Bathroom? Time to ask the hard questions of our seasonal walk-thru attractions.

Somebody had to say something.
andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/why-must-e...

💯💯💯💯💯💯

Deleted post-credits scene from “The Shining.”

Oh you think art is BORING, eh? Well allow me to introduce you to “De Dood” by Simon Fokke.

Trump is asking us to start choosing groups we're willing to abandon, and the only way to make him stop is to be clear we're not fucking abandoning ANYONE.

Call your reps. Call your fucking reps. Especially in red states. Use the @5calls.org app, it's easy and free.

Hundreds of Alligator Alcatraz detainees drop off the grid after leaving site As of the end of August, the whereabouts of two-thirds of more than 1,800 men detained at Alligator Alcatraz during the month of July could not be determined by the Miami Herald.

More than 1800 detainees are missing after the closure of Alligator Alcatraz. Their families and lawyers can’t find them and they’ve vanished from the ICE database. Feels like this should be a much bigger story www.miamiherald.com/news/local/i...

Spooky Monday: Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948) & Apple Dumplings A cozy combo to ring in The Autumnal Equinox

This week in honor of today’s Autumnal Equinox it’s “Spooky Monday” featuring “Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein” and a recipe for Classic Apple Dumplings!

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-mon...

There’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for people to build on the rubble of what’s being destroyed before our eyes. Private corporations bending over to forcefeed everyone government-approved speech is evil and amoral, but more than anything this creates boring, inauthentic, unwatchable shit.

(Lights up on Norah Jones dressed as Jaws)

“I waited for Quint’s anecdote
Then started to destroy his boat
He tried to surface me with barrel floats.
Don’t know why Quint’s in my throat. Don’t know why Quint’s in my throat.”

Spooky Sunday: Fear(s) of the Dark (2007) & Lemon Mousse An animated horror and a smooth dessert, both from France

Today’s “Spooky Sunday” features two French delights! The animated horror anthology “Fear(s) of the Dark” and a Jacques Pepin Lemon Mousse!

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

Good news! Anna Drezen’s cult romp “Praise Petey” is now available to stream on Prime Video! It was such a fun show to work on with so many talented folks, plus Al*x J*nes had a meltdown over it and called us all warlocks or something which was frankly better than an Emmy nomination. Go watch!

Did y’all know that in 1978 there was an ABC tv movie called “The Initiation of Sarah” in which a college sorority pledge discovers she’s a witch thanks to her evil house mother played by Shelley Winters and then this happens to Morgan Fairchild?

Spooky Sunday: The Changeling (1980) & Chocolate Cobbler What do a haunted house classic and this comforting dessert have in common? They're both hiding something.

Today’s Spooky Sunday pairing is a very easy Chocolate Cobbler recipe and an achingly frightening haunted house film, 1980’s “The Changeling.”

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

Spooky Sunday: Something Wicked This Way Comes (1983) & Apple Cookies The perfect pairing for your late August "Fall wantsies."

It may be 1000 degrees in LA, but this Spooky Sunday, we’re conjuring up an autumn chill with Disney’s most nightmarish foray into horror along with a very back-to-school cookie recipe!

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

My Brain: Ok, let’s get back to work.
My Laptop Screen:

And what did YOU do today??

Spooky Sunday: Jaws 2 (1978) & Sticky Toffee Pudding A schlocky sequel & a sloppy dessert

Real weird film/dessert pairing today!

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

My friend group

I’m always saying this

Spooky Sunday: "Monster Squad" & Wacky Cake A birthday mash-up of my two childhood favorites

Today’s my birthday, so as a little treat to myself, y’all know I had to write about “Monster Squad.”

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

If your MRI tech looks at you like this, he is UP TO SOMETHING.

Spooky Sunday: "Seance on a Wet Afternoon" (1964) & Lemon Vanilla Granita An overcast nail-biter meets a sunny dessert

This week’s “Spooky Sunday” brings a little much needed gloom to your sun-soaked July!

andrewduncanfarmer.substack.com/p/spooky-sun...

Yeah, I like A24.

(A wicked smile creeps across my face)

A 24-hour Denny’s!

Spooky Sunday: The Gate (1987) & Chocolate Chip Graham Cracker Cookies These two "Not-So-Guilty Pleasures" belong together

New “Spooky Sunday” is up! Including my favorite cookie recipe!

open.substack.com/pub/andrewdu...

Me when i have a totally normal exchange with a friend

It’s always endearing to me that this grizzled man seems to always have crackers on his person.

you all did your cute movie ballots, now you can cancel your subscriptions!!

I Don't Wanna Scare You — The Elysian Andrew Farmer has been getting in trouble for telling scary stories since he was a Catholic School kindergartener with a Vincent Price haircut. Now, he's woven together some of his favorite ghostly en...

Hey LA! I’m filming my solo show “I Don’t Wanna Scare You” at The Elysian on July 21st! It’s a cozy little night of scary jokes and funny ghost stories and I truly love performing it for folks, so it’d be a real treat to have you there! Tix available now!

www.elysiantheater.com/shows/andrew...

iPhone footage of him being escorted from the plane screaming with a cactus stuck to his behind.

Listen. I know travel is hard. And eccentricity is fun. But if you’re on a red eye flight. And you have a wild-ass sneeze. I’m asking you to “normal” it up even 30%.

Cuz I can’t do this “WACKweeweewee” thing every few minutes over the next 6.5 hours.