Wild Tyle

I get so defensive when someone smaller than me is in the section of clothes my size at a thrift store. Stop trying to make your baggy "fits" for IG seeing you here gives me body dysmorphia.

We are At War now, according to President Bush, and I take him at his word. He also says this War might last for "a very long time." Generals and military scholars will tell you that eight or 10 years is actually not such a long time in the span of human history - which is no doubt true - but history also tells us that 10 years of martial law and a wartime economy are going to feel like a Lifetime to people who are in their twenties today. The poor bastards of what will forever be known as Generation Z are doomed to be the first generation of Americans who will grow up with a lower standard of living than their parents enjoyed. That is extremely heavy news, and it will take a while for it to sink in. The 22 babies born in New York City while the World Trade Center burned will never know what they missed. The last half of the 20th century will seem like a wild party for rich kids, compared to what's coming now. The party's over, folks.

From Hunter S. Thompson’s ESPN page 2 column one week after 9/11.

I saw Gavin Newsom load a homeless family into a Waymo and shout, “the ocean please” into the steering wheel and then slap the back of it to send it off like a horse.

Getting a lot of upvotes (10) on my takes in the Survivor subreddit. Might start gambling after this.

A Titanfall extraction shooter would have whipped ass, probably.

But that's because Titanfall ANYTHING would whip ass and I think we should NOT cancel the game or fire the team building Titanfall

Thanks for coming to my lecture: we should all play movement-centric shooters and have a lot of fun

My romance? Chemical.

“is my calculator horny?“ our tech columnist asks. “i entered 5318008 into it and turned it upside down. what i saw surprised me”

Went to the eye doctor and he said my vision in my bad eye got better. Not the win I expected but at this point I'll take it.

This is a bar

Pop songs in the early 2010s really liked to reference other pop songs and artists

Had the idea of a Scholastic Book Fair for adults and then remembered that book stores exist

Is MLB TV crashing on Opening Day Donald Trump's Katrina?

When I say I’m Catholic, what I mean is that I do not believe in God but do believe in Hell.

I Get Sad About Restaurants Closing Last month one of my friends from home told me that our hometown diner was closing.

Hi I wrote about how restaurants closing make me sad and how we reflect our growth by what we order at diners and who we order with:

open.substack.com/pub/tylercha...

People on bluesky will really be like "you believe in firebombing Tesla? that pales in effectiveness to my strategy, winning elections" and then not win an election.

*Gets best yet again by Republicans as the country falls more and more into fascism*

No you see the problem is the guy everyone likes. Not my people who everyone hates more and more.

If most people agree that the introduction of other ingredients into a grilled cheese makes it a press and not a grilled cheese, why does no one point out that using any other noodle than macaroni in Mac and cheese make it NOT Mac and cheese?

There has never been a better time for Rage Against The Machine to come back with a new album that seems tepid compared to their original work and gets a 5.6 from Pitchfork

Being a guy is awesome. Last night I made friends at the bar by talking about the 2015 World Series.

I'd say yes but I did the same thing in like the 2nd grade

My gut when I start eating more chickpeas:

Sometimes when I sneeze my bones hurt after

boomer take

but apps that automatically turn ascii smiley faces into emojis instead are destroying cherished relics of the internet's golden age

nextdoor started sending me daily email digests i never asked for, but i'm really glad they did. someone just posted a photo of a parked car with a door open like "hey heads up in case this is your car." someone asked if they closed it. they said "no, because what if i close it and the car explodes"

Feeling like there's a big push to make citrus sumo a thing. Something is up.

Brazilians raging at Anora robbing their apparent guaranteed wins for I'm Not Here is so funny

People on Bluesky are miserable. Anora was fucking amazing. The non-Nazi side of Twitter loved it.

Being able to see the Reels your mutuals like on IG is diabolical

If the new season of Survivor doesn't immediately fix everything wrong in my life I'm going to be so pissed

And then you have Kanye removing the line "She be Puerto Rico Day parade floating" after Life of Pablo was released. I think that's really why I hate this trend.