goof lagoon

fuck i mixed up pavlov with schrödinger and now every time i ring a bell a cat might die

7 grown adults with AuDHD and only one is medicated. (thank god, it's me!)

Tired of yelling "WHAT AM I LOOKING AT?!?"

did AI write the 911 episode! ew

hehe am I high or does Matt Damon kinda look like Hilary Swank here

The company I work for just informed us they will no longer be supplying our break room with WATER, sugars, ketchup, mayonnaise... etc. To "cut back on costs" lmfao. I work for retina specialists...... the greed is INSANE

it's the fact that y'all need MULTIPLE different views/angles of this shootint... and STILL so many of you are deluding yourselves.

I've seen people say that the officer who murdered Nicole Good should be charged with murder, and to that I add that every officer who kept medics from arriving, who barred doctors from helping should also be charged under conspiracy doctrine.

I stay rebuking that lying spirit, bro!

He asked, "is dihydrogen monoxide a compound?" and her reply was "can you give me the short version?" Ummm....... it is quite literally IN THE NAME?

I just asked the internet how to recline my chair......

Overheard a boomer teacher another boomer how to use the Find my phone feature

Is it surprising to anyone that a people Oprah platformed turned out to be horrible people? Grass is green, sky is blue.

Ok but Zac Efron 😏

I know the outfit calls for boots, but my feet yearn for the sneaks. Comfort alwaysssss over fashion.

a man with a mustache is laying on a couch and says screaming ALT: a man with a mustache is laying on a couch and says screaming

Today, I managed to zip my upper eyelid to my sweater.

jerry from tom and jerry is crying with tears of joy written underneath him ALT: jerry from tom and jerry is crying with tears of joy written underneath him

& AS OF TONIGHT, LED BY AN IMMIGRANT

Shut the fuck up David Harbour.

a man wearing a white sweater says deep breaths ALT: a man wearing a white sweater says deep breaths

I have been almost completely no contact with my parents in the last year....... and in a few days we will be under the same roof for a month.

Dumbing everything down. Returning to analog.

Fuck Off Keira Knightly.

Using ChatGPT

Had a coworker just tell me ChatGPT was good for resume writing. I said, "well, so is my brain!" Tf????

I wanna know which boat I'm seeing right now on this associated press live feed!!!!! Gah

How hard is it to mind your own body?

Nobody is “grooming” your kids to be gay or trans but people ARE grooming them to be Nazis.

"If you're morally corrupt, you're automatically chopped!"

really unfair to have to tolerate how advertisements are in everything. now i'm having to see AI everywhere. I did not consent to that. turn it off!

the nerve of Spotify to suspend my account like theyre not the thieveing corporation they are

*opens up your fridge and sees you have 2% milk* hey bro you need to charge your milk