x2

Yeah yeah and Dear Leader shot a perfect 18 hole-in-one this morning before not taking a dump, because Dear Leader's immaculate backside has no need for a butthole for he is the divine manifestation of the great Juche Idea.

Sorry, wait, that's Kim Jong Un. I get them mixed up a lot these days.

Dear Leader's wallet.

Ha, exactly how a bunch of guilty people would act!

Respect.

How will Dear Leader ever recover from this rebuke.

I'm cultured enough to get this joke.

Fuck yeah.

Spoiler: Tariffs are a tax on Americans.

Oh okay, cool.

I'm glad we came to a consensus on that controversial topic.

Dude, what the fuck.

Dude, I kinda just want to wake up in the year 1995 and all this bullshit be a manifestation of my darker psyche.

I'm convinced people like MTG have trouble with their self-image. It's hard to truly know yourself when you can't even see yourself in a fucking mirror. Shit, sorry, that's vampires, but I digress

Weird, it's almost like she was in it to enrich herself with insider trading deals and other shady, if not outright illegal bullshit.

Fuckin weird, man.

This man's perpetual shit-eating grin makes me instantly hate him all over again every time I see his goofy ass mug.

Oh okay the pod person smiling guy says everything is fine thank goodness.

Looks awful, I'll take it.

"Oh no, please don't pick me up and throw me into that briar patch, Miss Halligan."

I want to believe it's a blessing he's such a transparently pathological grifter.

Meanwhile, fucking Forbes over here like "Don't spend that dividend check quite yet!"

Okay, guys, I'll try my hardest.

He's soft-handed trash.

Shut the fuck up, Sean.

"generational consequences"

Like, eventual imprisonment?

I don't think Comey could've picked a better prosecutor to help his case even if he could.

CPS should check in on her 14 year old daughter.

Yikes.

Becoming an adult and realizing a non-trivial number of my peers have practically zero critical thinking skills, media literacy, and they couldn't give less of a shit was fun and scary. It still is, really.

Wait what, why would churches resist a president who is such a shining example of Christianity?

Aw, they're gonna spoon.

They're unfuckable trash.

It's an important milestone, up there with the relationship's first shared fart.

This is why I could never be a lawyer.

My verbiage would be a bit less diplomatic regardless this Make-a-Wish prosecutor and the worthless dipshits enabling her.

Thank god we have such a brave and fearless Dear Leader, who would roll back the economically destructive policies of Dear Leader.

To be honest, it reeks of fear.