Lewis Jones

Honestly, too bitter :(

You know when you’re not having an interesting day when you eat a raw carrot just to feel something

Just watched A Serious Man for the first time in 16 years

I’ve tricked myself into liking days where I go into the office because I have a great lunch and I stay incredibly hydrated because refilling my water bottle gives me something to do

Josie! 🥰 thank you. I love you, you’re so wonderful xx

Cheers Chris!

Hahaha thanks lads

Haven’t got the usual birthday melancholy today (18th birthday, half my life ago, playing Guitar Hero III in my pants all day remains the high/lowpoint) but also not “wow I’m alive and excited to be 35”

When I see Tayris on #DragRaceUK I just see a Gen Z Gary Wilmot

Just teared up thinking about what a wonderful man Big John is #bosh

YouTube video by therushden BELLAMY'S PEOPLE - Geoffrey Allerton

Every time I see clips of Starmer’s speech, I just see this: youtu.be/8lMexzk3TA8?...

Guys, do you remember when Dec gave Ant a magic eye book and it made his eyes pop out of his skull, so Dec and Cat started Ant Aid to raise money and they released the charity single Blink for Ant, with Victoria Beckham and Billie Piper and Louise and Martine McCutcheon?

A very special thing

Is it a really great conker though?

I’m only disappointed the quad didn’t go deep into their Spurs oeuvre. Hot Shot Tottenham is my fave

I can’t believe a Spurs fan would say something that disgusting

Finding it very hard to sleep lately as I have the folk song/sea shanty Barrett’s Privateers so firmly stuck in my head

And by partner, we mean her sister Linda Robson right?

Pauline Quirke Lives In With Her Partner

Ocean Colour Scene’s Moseley Shoals.

Also, if I’m a 34 year old man, he’s listening to Moseley Shoals.

Either way, my lungs are filled with secondhand smoke and I’m nauseous

I hate being in London at the best of times, but the heat yesterday was so oppressive that I was almost tempted to jump in the river and drown

Few things bringing me as much joy in life at the moment than the complete shambles that is Sheffield United Football Club

The first poem was a tour of the Greek goddesses and how they affect the lives of the happy couple. I cringed myself inside out.

Went to a wedding where 2 speeches were in the form of a poem with an ABAC rhyme scheme. Neither then managed to fit the scansion or rhyme that they had set themselves. Why do it to yourself? And why make me listen? During the second my sister took a drag of her vape and said “I wish this was crack”

Sickos.jpg

Went to the Proms last night (Shostakovich’s 5th) and really enjoyed it, despite not being a big classical guy

I really like how at the start the orchestra plays the sound from turning a PlayStation 3 on, presumably to signal that you’re going to have a great time

You know I am old because I’ve just written a letter of complaint to the BBC

I have purposefully curated the names of many of these entrants, so that I can have a Thomas Skinner/Mike Mitchell style rattle-offing of strange named acquaintances

A screenshot of a Google Sheets form showing 12 fantasy football draft teams

Last night was the best night of the year: Fantasy Football Draft night. Unseen are the fake hot takes, limericks and "celebrity" videos that decided the draft order, but who has got the best team?

Shock of my life hearing @loscampesinos.bsky.social in the music round of this week’s Round Britain Quiz on Radio 4 (didn’t help me answer the question, mind)