J.P.

"I DON'T NEED YOU TO FUCKING REWRITE WHAT I'VE JUST WRITTEN!"

This one hurt.

Cartoon by Stephen Collins for the Guardian. [Scene is BBC BREAKFAST with two presenters and a guest on the sofa]. 1 PRESENTER: Now - some disturbing new research has shown 2 PRESENTER: that as many as 10 non-Reform political parties may currently operating ‘under the radar’ across the UK. [Show on screen logos for Greens, Lib Dems, Conservatives  3 PRESENTER: In the studio to discuss this, Nigel Farage [We see the guest on the sofa is indeed Nigel Farage] 4 PRESENTER: Nigel, what’s your view?  FARAGE: Well I think this very worrying. 5 FARAGE: And just another reason why we should ban all immigration. 6 PRESENTER: I won’t push back on that FARAGE: Absolutely! 7 PRESENTER: Funnily enough, this is what your new show’s about, isn’t it? FARAGE: Oop - plug time! PRESENTER: Ha ha 8 FARAGE: Yes it’s a 12-part BBC documentary called ‘In Search Of The Political Parties That Aren’t My One’. 9 [Show on the TV screen Farage presenting a documentary series titled In Search Of The Political Parties That Aren’t My One. He is wearing his farmer's getup and looking dreamily at the UK from hillsides, visiting pubs and chatting with the locals, etc] FARAGE: It’s a really emotional journey  10 FARAGE: with lots of dreamy footage of me looking relatable...  11 FARAGE: as I answer the question: *Am I the only option for Britain?* 12 [Cut back to studio] PRESENTER: I won’t push back on that FARAGE: Absolutely! [ends]

i sincerely hope that A Certain Other Irish Pop Star gets the help that she needs, but right now she is very publicly acting like a bully and is absolutely not a voice to be listened to or trusted when it comes to trans lives. can i ask for all the lovely people in the irish/musicy/ gay/alloftheabove circle who are *rightfully* outraged by her latest series of tweets to not share them? i can tell that everyone's intentions are good but it can be quite traumatising to spread around this bogus 'data. I really care about prevention of harm to the trans community and i believe in the power of cutting off hate at the source. anyways. today seems like as fabulous a day as ever to donate to TENI, Trans Equality Network Ireland. https://teni.ie/donate/?fbclid=PAZnRzaANncGtleHRuA2FlbQIxMQABp2cnZliqOys3gQKkAF8NEpuBafVfttOvDRjB-OQJ7l87861IlgPXkrXzoDXq_aem_HF0eRetIzgAfhfLYk8-y4Q i love you all so much ! let's work harder to protect our trans family during these

CMAT is a legit legend

[Jabba the Hutt voice] crypto to your sipp or isa, ho ho ho

🧐

It’s truly unreal how many times GDT has said something that resonates with me, personally, on the deepest possible level.

1 Nurse: It’s become a real problem in this area 2 Nurse: We’ve seen the whole community lost to addiction 3 Show a building sign posted: Westminster ‘X’ Addiction Clinic With various Westminster people or looking at their phones outside it Nurse: Ministers, Spads, Researchers… 4 Nurse: Most mornings we’ll get a call about someone acting strangely [Nurse on phone taking a call] Ok - we’ll be right over 5 Nurse: We just have a gentle chat [Nurses approach a minister –Robert Jenrick? - standing in the Palace of Westminster Minister: I understand your concerns… 6 Nurse: Are you OK love? Minister: Yes I’m just hearing legitimate concerns from real voters 7 Nurse: That’s a robot, a Nazi and a poorly-disguised Russian [Show that the people he is talking to are precisely these characters] Nurse 2: Give us your phone, love 8 Nurse: At the clinic we put them in a Grass-Touching Pod, with a real voter to talk to [We see them back at the clinic, holding the minister's head and pushing him into a glass isolation booth with a grass floor. And it is a baffled looking woman, on a chair, ready to talk to him.] 9 Minister: YOU MUST BE WORRIED ABOUT THE COMING CIVIL WAR [woman looks baffled] 10 woman: I just want a bus service Minister: LOOK AT MY FLAG [produces a St George's flag] [ends]

Stroking having multiple possible meanings, knowing them.

The fact that yours is the only reply I can see tells me my blocklists work perfectly.

For the first time in 21 years? But I keep being told trans people were only invented in 2015…?

CHATGPT: I understand where you're coming from. You worked really hard to get here, and now it's time to enjoy the fruit of your labors.

ISILDUR: So I should keep it? Elrond says I shouldn't

CHATGPT: The ring is precious. Sometimes friends don't have your best interests at heart.

ISILDUR: true

Screenshot of Fullmetal Alchemist, with Ed’s pocket watch carved with “Don’t forget 3.Oct.10”.

Happy Mean Girls Day!

The "on October 3rd, he asked me what day it was It's October 3rd" moment from Mean Girls

It is a high holy day

Think we have ‘28 Years Later’ to thank for that.

Excited to introduce Vibes from Meta. Eat your slop, piggies!

Bitten by a radioactive willy, he became…

This advert still hits. HARD.

A cartoon of myself against a photographed background. I’m approaching a big box from Penguin Random House placed on my dining room table.

I’m now kneeling over the box on the floor on top of a rug in front of my couch, preparing to open the box

I’m now jubilantly hopping around with a copy of my book in my hand, a slightly crazed look on my face.

My cartoon hand holds a copy of Angelica and the Bear Prince, cartoon stars and sparkles around it

I hate unboxing videos. HOWEVER, I am a CARTOONIST. So.

Goebbels Ends Careers of Five 'Aryan' Actors Who Made Witticisms About the Nazi Regime Feb 4th 1939

From Feb 4th 1939

Imagine all cars were electric, and then one Volkswagen engineer comes up with another idea …

#EMobility

King Charles and Camilla sat on big red thrones, ala Greg Davies and Alex Horne on Taskmaster

And here's my assistant, Little Parker Booowles!

Every time I see WSJ on this website I need a few seconds to work out it means Wall Street Journal, because my brain can’t stop reading it as Weekly Shonen Jump. 😭

Tumblr post saying “me high as fuck vibing with my cat” and pokemon screenshots of Pokemon the first movie with Mewtwo saying “What is my reason to live?” Mew saying “mew” and Mewtwo responding with “You’re right. I see now that the circumstances of one’s birth are irrelevant.”

Shame he won’t keep in with his electorate.

They also don’t have to comment on it - Starmer didn’t say anything when a sitting member of american government and her husband were shot in their home earlier this year.

Why make a statement in this case?

Political Violence isn’t ok - until it escalates into War Crimes, at which point Sir Keir is willing to let it slide.