logan ward

any sufficiently advanced posing clips are indistinguishable from solo male porn

someone in class said “I think those LED headlights are bad” and it pissed me off like what a cold take. me personally I think the people driving the LED headlight cars should be taken to town squares and viciously murdered

usually when I see people doing stuff I dont understand in the gym I tend to imagine they know what theyre doing and that it doesnt matter that I dont. but sometimes someones just throwing pussy ass air punches and its like. dude go do that at home u look like a dumbass. go lift weights or something

disabled woman rolling down the sidewalk in her electric wheelchair, clutching a coffee, smoking a cigarette. A man dressed like shaggy and his girlfriend who clearly just got pounded wearing obviously his clothing. always something to see in Portland.

calling every gym in the portland metro trying to find the one with the greatest number of midtier bodybuilder girls just so that I can never speak to them or even look at them👍

softlaunched being in a throuple at family dinner and my sister started cryign

snow day as a kid: stay inside and play video games!

snow day as an adult: get drunk and drive on the wrong side of the road!

all you can trust is everyone #wisepost

white boy SHOCKS waiter by ordering in broken english (MUST SEE)

you fool, obviously they picked the unlimited bacon

hyped

other than my heart (torn apart) the stripper date when great without loss of organs

I have a date with two strippers that I met at my workplace (bar) this week. any tips for keeping my organs intact or is it just a roll of the dice

softlaunching your new girlfriend to your wife be like please move out 🙏

yes I do go to portland state why do you ask

do you think a waterpik as a handheld bidet is a bad idea

I hate being in college because why I have to turn around and discuss the reading with the person behind me who has with “DYKE” tattooed across their throat in big, unambiguous letters. that is insane

#squidgame aint no game

listen I know its fucked up to reduce a group of people to a number but the only name I can remember is Thanos and thats stupid as fuck

new year new me, I am performing #experiments and changing myself

first date, rawdog her canal, suezcide mission

a hundredth geck has hit the tower

the porn intros with hardcore penetration footage overlapped by royalty free YT music are insane

@jacktender.bsky.social are you happy now you sick SOB

nvm she has cancer

I’m 23 and my mom has an ultrasound scheduled for today like lol am I really gonna be a big bro again at this age???

ask her what kind of condoms she prefers (shows you are an empath and respect her) and then tell her “damn sorry they dont have that in xsmall :(“

most beautiful woman youve ever met in your entire life, or just pretty red hair. how are you supposed to know