The Crypt Keeper

This country needs new BLEEDership.

AH-HEHEHEHAHAHAHA

The Crypt Keeper has better skin, more charisma and people actually want to spend time with him.

I'm afraid I can only give this one a 9 out of 10. He missed a perfect opportunity to call it a KanGHOUL!

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The Crypt Keeper: (wearing a backwards Kangol) You’ve got to FRIGHT for your RIGHT to part-FLEE AH HA HA HA HEE HA HEE

Who isn't a fan of the BEASTie BOILS?

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We just call that a "CORPSEplayer"

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Dumb D&D idea: players find a note with faded letters, but it looks like they can find vast amounts of treasure in the “Crypt Keeper’s Tomb.”

They arrive find an undead obsessing over worthless copies of valuable trinkets, and learn the undead’s true title: The Crypto Keeper

In my Cryptkeeper voice, I call this tale of devilish delight "Ghouls night out." Cryptkeeperlaugh

bsky.app/profile/thec...

Would have also accepted carcass copying, your dead majesty.

Love it? I ABHOR it!

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Please, Cryptie is just fine. I'm just a regular Joe-schmo, not a descendant of BOILty.

That's what happens when you start HORRORmone replacement therapy.

AH-HEHEHAHAHAHA

Thanks for COFFIN copying me on that one!

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Got cryptkeeper dysphoria, born a boy but I transitioned to a ghoul yeeheeeheeheeheee

Well the Cryptkeeper is Definately sexier Than Steven KILLER..oops... Miller.

The phrase "emerging writer" makes me think you're rising out of a swamp to enact an ancient vengeance on the town folk

And the phrase "HEMORRHAGING writer" makes me think you're one of their victims.

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And you could, too!

You have to understand that this was our first shot at the silver SCREAM. The DIErector was DEADset on casting Ralph RichardSIN and I was just thrilled to DEATH at the thought of making a movie.

Besides, the movie filmed in the UK and, at the time, I didn't have a PASSEDport.

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If I were in charge of the HEXuctive branch, you would see true BLEEDership.

I could never run, though. There are too many SKELETONS in my closet.

AH-HEHEHEHEHA

I'm always happy to FRIGHTEN someone's day with my whimsical witticisms.

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I've had many careers. I've been an apiarist, a soccer goalie, and an accountant. I even cleaned hotel rooms, at one point.

Law keeping was only a small portion of my afterlife.

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Thank you for the subskeet, Crypt Keeper! Big fan of your unflappable humor and raw sexuality!

I'd call that episode The Tell-Tale HARLOT

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"MUMMY always said life was like a box of SHOCKolates."

- FEARest Gump

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It’s Saturday!

Post a cartoon series that you love. 📺🖤

a man in a bow tie is talking about lost wages Alt: a man in a bow tie is talking about lost wages

I like to call it LOST WAGES!

AH-HEHEHEHAHAHAHA

250 Million Honeybees Escape After a Truck Rolls Over in Washington State

@darthbluesky.bsky.social “In the northwest corner of Washington State on Friday morning, the authorities issued a most unusual all-points bulletin, rather, an A.P.Bee.” www.nytimes.com/2025/05/30/u...

Oh you evil ghoul!!

Don't ruin my gond child time memories of you and classics like The Mummy Never Sleeps!?

Also

Pretty good