Amy Park

It doesn't matter how much anybody loves, accepts, or is attracted to us if our relationship w/ ourselves is a sh*t show. We don't always have to love, or even like ourselves-- but the inside of our head does need to be a safe place for us. A safe place we curate & develop daily.

A reminder for today, the next four years, and always as we continue progressing toward the dream of Martin Luther King Jr.

This is what the U.S. doesn't have. Democracy is something most Americans take for granted because we have not had to fight for it in generations. That could very well be about to change. I hope we step up. And what an example we saw today of how to do that!

So here’s my morning after immediate analysis of why Yoon Suk Yeol’s self coup of December 3-4, 2024 failed. I’ll try to highlight 5 things, but they are not mutually exclusive. 1/

"Progress over perfection" isn't a bullsh*t platitude-- it's how real world trauma recovery works. There is zero shame in being a train wreck. Be a train wreck-- but work your recovery.

I'll bet on a "mess" of a survivor honestly working their recovery every time.

Well, I have texts on because it's my son’s primary form of communication. Otherwise, I probably wouldn't. And same with my number; very few people have it.

We need our anger in trauma recovery, because almost NO significant change in ANY complex system-- including nations, governments, organizations, churches, down to the nervous systems of individual people-- happens WTHOUT anger.

Used skillfully, anger is essential fuel.

Same. Except for texts, notifications are off for everything in my phone. The device and its apps should serve me, I shouldn't be a slave to it.

The key is to not obsessively check your email. If it's family time, turn off notifications and don't look. It's not that hard.

We can't expect our dissociative "parts" to communicate or cooperate w/ us unless we make time to listen to them, take them seriously when they have something they need or something to say, & integrate their strengths & priorities into our trauma recovery vision.

Not being aware of pain because a dissociative "part" of us is holding it isn't the same as not feeling it. Part of us ALWAYS feels it-- the question is, do we let that part hold that pain alone?

For my money, recovery means NOT abandoning or ignoring our suffering "parts."

It's one of my favorite Broadway musicals, but I'm not as excited about the movie. I'm seeing it with my great-aunt in a couple of weeks. So many of the Broadway to film adaptations just aren't great.

It can be profoundly healing for trauma survivors who, for years, were conditioned to assume everything was their fault & everything was their responsibility, to actually let something be somebody else's problem for once.

You need to know that trauma processing happens in layers. Waves. It's almost never the case that "I talked about that, now it's done."

Processing grief works the same way-- and that's not a coincidence.

It has been quite the journey. Lots of healing. Lots of honesty. Lots of anger. Now, a lot of peace. It's learning that self-love is about being transparent with yourself. It all starts with that.

A screenshot from an interview with RM of BTS. The background shows a road stretching ahead, seen through the windshield of a car. The translated text reads: It feels like I have connection to my past, present, and future.

After years of feeling disconnected from myself, this year it has all come together. To find that connection, I've experienced loss, grieved, been angry, & finally made peace with who I am. It's allowed me to see who I want to become, the best version of me. #RightPeopleWrongPlace

In recovery, we realize: almost every trauma response is an attempt by some part of us to feel more in control or experience more comfort-- and almost every effective recovery tool works because it acknowledges the reality & validity of those needs.

Pretty much every trauma survivor I've ever worked with has been a highly sensitive soul existing in a highly complicated physical situation-- including their body, their housing or living situation, their economic circumstances, & their medical status. For starters.

Beautiful!

Yes! This is how my eyes were opened to my own emotional abuse. I started to see my son being treated similarly.

This made me soooo happy! I can't even put it into words.

Safe people are happy to have conversations about what you need to feel & be safe, & why your past experiences might make it difficult to feel safe.

It is amazing and terrifying to be someone who isn't a static person. It's wonderful to find new parts of yourself, but scary to face what you'll lose as you evolve. And those losses are guaranteed. That's why I feel it's rare to meet people like this. But when you do, what a journey!

I'm totally OK with being called woke. It just means that I'm showing off my green flags. Happy to follow others with green flags.

#woke

Trauma conditions us to abandon & betray ourselves, like we were abandoned & betrayed by people & churches who should have cared for us.

Recovery is our commitment to have our own back & be own our own side-- no matter what our old programming is pressuring us to do.

One of the reasons survivors can be so exhausted, so often, is we're experiencing pressure inside to justify & defend every goddamn thing we feel or need-- which comes from a lifetime of people questioning & gaslighting us about things everyone else takes for granted.

IYKYK.

Recommendation:

At your public library, check out gorgeous art books this winter.

You know, that huge type of book you wouldn't necessarily buy -- but is a glory to keep company with for awhile.

Living courageously caring little of what others think is one of the hardest things you will do. You will be disappointed. Lonely. You will lose people you thought loved you.You will come to love the solitude. You will be discerning about who becomes a part of your life. Quite the journey!

I've been here for more than a year, waiting for moots to join me. Glad many of you are here! Now to find you. 😁