Eyeriss

Making homemade stadium nachos so I am get a glimpse of what life would be like if my father loved me

Hell yeah

If Canada becomes a state Sufjan Stevens has to add it to the remaining 48 state albums he has to make and frankly I think its too much for him.

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t4t married couple nearing homelessness, job stopped providing hours this month, anything helps, will do anything to pay it back or forward

Hell yeah dude. Hell yeah. They say good things can happen dude. Hell yes dude. Yes.

The fact that blocking bots doesn't make them unfollow me will very soon diminish my lowbie privilege and i for one won't stand for it

Natural blonde and faded green dye got me looking like a piece of moldy bread

Coming down from a cold and i could very easily solo the bass section from any choir

God gave me two gifts on this earth: a huge hog and baking skills and baby, im piping noon and night

White ppl love that i put salt in my food

Who trymna get me pregnent

In my old age im becoming a seasonal handle type bitch

No i dont need a job i need 4-5 trans men grinding on me

Shoutout the xray tech at the ER who thought that i needed my potential fetus protected from radiation whom i didnt have the heart to tell that i have a penis

Im engaging my fight or flight personally

How did they expect to show me biblical satan with a fat ass on cow and chicken and expect me to be straight wtf is this

They call me ranch cuz i be dressing

Problematic age gap between my milk and my cereal

Just got out of six flags court they made me swear on a gucci mane album that i wouldnt rip air duster down the water slide again

Brother is three major voting blocs in one call that the votey trinity

Shoutout my husband for being my #1 fan and also for cleaning the litterboxes so I can appreciate our cats more

Quitting my job was a good decision because now i can focus on finishing my Dracula+Megatron transgender slow burn romance, Megatransylvanian nights II: Blood and Oil

Two cats sitting in a chair previously occupied by a human ass

I got evicted :(

Welp i got one follower time to commit a faux pas by accidentally jacking off on stream