Voltaireon - 5 caustic French philosophers in a trenchcoat

Well, he’s living by the sword. Better get busy on that second part…

It’s a date!

*pours coffee into OpenAI data/compute center racks*

I’m willing to start stoning false prophets to death again, as is Biblically-mandated.

Headcanon: Mrs. Who from “A Wrinkle in Time” is Doctor Who’s wife, and all three Mrs are Time Lords.

Of course, that also means that the QB has to play the replacement player’s position for a snap, too.

Which leads to some wacky hijinx as the O line and QB get some role reversal experience…

I think we should let everyone have a snap at QB. It’s such a high-profile position, give all the players a chance to have their moment in the sun!

Yep, that too!

(If that’s not addressing what you were asking, apologies!)

A majority Democratic vote in those districts would make it blue, sure, but the purpose of gerrymandering is to overwhelmingly concentrate Democrats into as few districts as possible, so their collective votes result in a minimum of actual legislative representation.

Look, I’d love to cancel my sub to the Völkischer Beobachter, but it’s essential for me to get the perspective of the other side.

From the opening of AI-generated Mamdani shoveling rice into his mouth with his hands to the Idris Elba clone making sure to tie on his keffiyeh before shoplifting, my jaw just kept sagging further and further open as Cuomo kept turning the “RACISM” dial and glancing over his shoulder.

Trebuchet Cuomo onto the next NY garbage barge

(Andrew or Chris? Porque no los dos?)

Don’t even get me fucking started on that Birth-of-a-Nation-ass clanker shit that the Cuomo campaign dropped before coyly going “Tee hee whoopsie what an accident!”

He’s said TONS of antisemitic things in their imaginations, which is good enough for them.

At this point I feel they’re just leaning into their prions, not priors.

Good! We know which reeducation camp to send him to.

Honestly, this was really lazy, but in my defense (a) I’m burnt out from the Nazification of this country’s government and (b) it’s Sunday morning.

A Facebook bio section saying: Founder and High Irreverend at Church of the Giant Death Asteroid May 2012 - Present

Tbh, it's just evangelizing on my part

A cereal box modified to say "Oops! All Nazis!”

I’ve often applied the “Rand/Ron Paul 1 minute rule” that I heard about years ago:

Rand/Ron Paul always make reasonable points for about a minute, and then they go straight off the rails.

Doomsday cults, man. Smh.

DO YOU HAVE A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT OUR LORD AND SAVIOR GIANT ASTEROID?

Probably a stupid question, but since I’m not on TikTok I don’t have a frame of reference…are TikTok shops set up such that only the owners/admins can add products to it, or are there, I dunno, “collaborative” shops, where it’s treated more like a marketplace?

I mean, that was more “unintended consequences” than this “give us your private info or GTFO”, I guess.

I remember when Strava published an anonymized heat map of their users’ GPS tracks (with the idea being that people could see what popular running routes are).

Accidentally revealed a handful of secret military bases where the soldiers had Strava running while doing their PT.

I can’t wrap my head around the magnitude of moral rot that this administration spreads constantly. It makes me despair that we’re normalizing this level of inhumanity and depravity…and bringing tens of millions of Americans along that journey too.

“I eat mental children” as a compromise?

The scene from "Desperado" where the guitar false top swings up to reveal a bunch of weapons...but the guitar has "This machine kills fascists" written on it

Woody Guthrie had the right idea, we're just taking the next step...

Richard Posner's going to Hulk out and escape from that care home specifically to come pummel these two.

INSOUCIANT! THAT’S the fuckin’ word I was trying to recall about his gesture with the cigar