SaMartha Lang

Other side of the same bridge on my drive home yesterday 🥳

Say it ain’t so

Frodo don’t destroy the ring, you’ll just be playing into their hands by reacting at all imho

Feels like I'm leaving money on the table by not doing a scam or swindle of some kind. Would you guys buy a car for $100,000 if I pretended it can drive itself. What about a fake currency

Wtf man you’re going crazzyyyy!!! 👏👏👏

It’s way past time

can't believe it's 2025 and i'm stressed about tariffs and measles, like am i a character in an american girl book

Sorry gang I’m not in therapy rn so I had to say it somewhere

Not to be a total fucking bummer on main but convincing myself to walk into my house today knowing I would not be greeted by Telly’s wagging tail and gift of Nearest Stuffed Thing was nearly impossible. My worst First.

Costco and Trader Joes are yin and yang. Together they form a harmonious balance. One sells big piles of normal food, the other sells small piles of weird food. These are the two food piles people need

I gotta start posting about Traitors again so I can have just a littttleeee bit less doom on my discover page. Just a teensy weensy reprieve. CAROLYN!!!!!!!!!!!

Let’s goooo!!

I call it X now because i used to fuck with it and no longer do

Thank you!!! 💪

"use this gift hyper link to read the article" to me every hyper link is a gift

@theyearofchad.bsky.social pupdate above!

Surgeon believes the mass they removed has to be cancerous despite previous tests saying it’s not. Probably just couldn’t get tissue deep enough to show what we needed to see in the original biopsy. For now, at least most of it is out of him & he is comfortable. 💕

Yesterday was a day! Teller is stable now but was not for a while there. Bless the absolute badass surgeon & staff that kept him afloat. They sent us this pic mid life-saving blood transfusion 🤪 goofy ahh. We pick him up tomorrow to recover at home ❤️‍🩹

This is soooooooooo embarrassinggggggggggg

Hi dogsky they’re starting surgery on Teller now, pls send your good energy to the boy real quick because this is not at all the surgery he went in for & is a much more risky situation. Bellybean 🙏💕

Just saw a farmer say, "you don't have to admit you were wrong, you have to admit you were lied to, " and idk that seems like a good framing to call people in

Should clarify I meant you did not hear that man say anything about kazoos but if you did I’d love that timestamp!

LMFAO

I know there's no point in saying this because y'all are lost in the sauce, but no you absolutely did not hear that straight from the treasury secretary lmfao.

Chris Diamantopoulos (Moe), Sean Hayes (Larry) and Will Sasso (Curly) in the Farrelly Brothers reboot of 'The Three Stooges'

feels like America got tagged into a "first picture on your camera roll is coming to save you from fascism" meme and we pulled this

Omg yes please because I’m living for the zero airtime Sam Asghari season.

wow just logged off and there are problems there too

holy flip