Amanda B

“.. 55% of employed Americans say they’re concerned about losing their jobs, and 62% of respondents said the cost of their everyday items had climbed over the last month.”

@bloomberg.com
www.bloomberg.com/news/article...

What if The Onion was always just preparing us for the future?

My Dad has been showing me the Michigan leaf situation hour by hour. Here we are, day 9.

You know what I've never heard of?

An admin shortage, just a nursing one.

10/10 Recommended this coffee cup.

"You smell so good, what are you wearing?"

Me: A latte

"By who?"

Me: No, I literally spilled my latte on myself this morning.

"Oh."

I feel like I'm in a hostage situation with Chick-fil-A, drop the peppermint shake already, the world is on fire during a burn ban.

My hospital is laying people off and if I get laid off, I cannot express how much of an absolute menace I will become.

So it wasn't a $5 felony

I realized I was having such a nice and quiet morning, then I realized I never opened Teams.

Will I be taking a shift in the ED on the night Taco Bell releases a Baja Blast pie?

Absolutely not.

Why does the new Range Rover look like a Smeg toaster? Was that intentional?

I cash them out of spite because I paid for them and then tell people to never send me any points again.

Encore???? We get those points and taxed too!

I will never take for granted the shady shots that cameramen get of male attorney's scraggly little ponytails.

We are feeding people, offering neighbors meals, donating food, whatever we need to do, paying off school lunches, we are doing it.

If I should pass untimely, please get this book to Josh or Dennis before you give it to the police. My best friend will already be solving my murder, no need for the cops.

The lady selling Beanie Babies on fb marketplace for $7,000/each, has to be laundering money.

I'm making dips for the game, like I'm having a party but it's just me and these crockpots and cheeses.

What we don't talk about is hoe important it is that these crime shows give a record and space for families who are estranged after a crime, to tell their estranged grandchildren/nieces/nephews that they love them and will always be waiting for them to become adults and reconnect.

Summer is over, back to bathing in Retin-A.

Ready to wrap it up next week and get the tree up.

My Dad is a Marine explains a lot of the "why?".

Worried my elderly patients will starve but thank God the ballroom is getting a makeover.

If you @ me in a Teams Message only you and I are in, you're going to end up on a t-shirt with wings behind your picture.

Might sell copies of my completed Grievance Journal.

Listen, I'll quit my job before I drive to Dallas for it. Jesus Christ himself won't get me there.

What is a 4×5 blanket even trying to do?

I won a gift bag at work, I bet they tax me on it.