Pale

we're onto the hawks

let's go seahawks!! 😀 i love seahawks we're 4-2 and doing well 😀 i've never wtached baseball in my life and don't even know what it is 😀

I'm shaken at the news of Daniel Naroditsky's death, one of the best and most talented chess teachers the internet has seen, RIP

actually it's tonight

today's a very important day for all washingtonians and no matter the result it will overwhemingly dictate my mental health for the next month which is the healthy outcome

They've really done nothing to take advantage of it like running up the counts on our pitchers and we might have the best pitching in baseball rn

usually there's some dumbass fuckery that happens by now, but this team showed up to toronto and methodically dismantled them for two games after everyone thought they'd be beaten down and exhausted. i don't even recognize them as the mariners

for the first time ever in my mariners fandom i am experiencing a glimmer of hope

i cannot believe they pulled that off, bryce miller just gave one of the all time performances lmao

The Mariners are in the ALCS OMGGGGG

currently feeling like I just finally pissed after having to hold it for so long

DIVISION WINNERS!!!

The Mariners are something special

Bill Belichick

Heard the Big Beautiful Bill passed. Rip 🙏

piano fell on me from a four story drop and my teeth became piano keys 😔

the woke mob is talking about the Virgin Mary but not the Virgin Mark

He 100% put the result of their last matchup with the Ravens on himself and wanted to get this one back for his boys

I've been getting myself caught in a lotta kerfuffles lately

Brian Daboll would probably be a better coach if he was named Brian Daball like a foot"ball"

special teams excellence

a person laying on a bed with a picture on the wall ALT: a person laying on a bed with a picture on the wall

"and now for our rules analyst Gene Steratore-"

Always a good afternoon to watch the Saints get owned

they should put little fortunes in those t-shirt launchers at basketball games that say things like "outlook for your team not so good!"

I'm not making it through the Brainworm Era alive I gotta be honest

the ghost of joe lieberman, holding up a pair of socks: discord ceo, sir, can you tell me what these are

discord ceo: those are thigh-high cat paw socks made for petite men, sir

If you think about it the Dead Kennedys band name will always age well with time, no exception

Tomorrow I'm going to go outside

I'm not prepared to explain to my dad all these internet brainrot memes today

There are lots of beautiful women in the world

ON TV TONIGHT (columns for 8:00, 9:00, 10:00) ABC: Attack On America America Attacked America In Crisis America Still In Crisis NBC: A Nation Looks Around For Someone To Hit America On The Verge Of Flying Off The Handle America's Time Of Trial: Who Fucking Wants Some? You? Do You? How 'Bout You? CBS Dan Rather's 83rd Straight Hour On The Air Dan Rather Seriously Loses His Shit Medicating Dan Rather BET Wartime At The Apollo Tavis Smiley Presents: Terrorists Strike America-The White Man Finds Somebody Else To Fear And Demonize For A Change MTV The 100 Greatest, But, In Light Of Recent Events, Not As Important As Being Good To Our Loved Ones, Videos Of All Time Yo! MTV Extends Its Condolences Talking To Blink 182 About The Tragedy Carson Daly In Way Over His Head Lifetime Golden Girls Golden Girls Golden Girls Golden Girls Golden Girls Golden Girls History Last Tuesday In History Two Weeks Ago, As Told By Those Who Lived It Last Tuesday In History (rerun)

Behold, the best 9/11 humor of all time: The Onion's TV listings (my favorite row is MTV)