LizL

Surround yourself with the kind of people who consider The Princess Bride to be one of the greatest films of all-time.

Or just wanna Sunday goal 🤷‍♀️

They're playing 'Cloudbusting' in the pub and the sun is shining if you wanna a Sunday goal.

Remembering the Night Porter #MarkLanegan

Tried to go to the pub. It's like fucking xmas. Came back home to boost the economy of my own house.

"and it didn't do me any harm" says the most visibly harmed man you have ever encountered.

Don't give anything an Emmy until it's as good as this.

🥇🥇🥇

Ironic that a man barely ever in his workplace should make such a call.

People who say they're 'minded' to do something come across like an absolute cunt. There are no exceptions to this rule.

Can we nuke ourselves? Is that an option? x

My ungraded general studies A level.

'So we thought we'd give them a chance to do it again'

Special Report: Stripped Tees IT WAS to be the UK’s largest regeneration scheme in decades, a model for regional devolution and the flagship post-Brexit freeport. But the redevelopment of the former steelworks on the south bank of...

As Tees Valley mayor Lord Houchen's defence of his deal with local businessmen crumbles, here's the Eye's recent special report on how Britain's flagship regeneration scheme secretly turned into one of the biggest giveaways of public money on record.

➡️ www.private-eye.co.uk/special-repo...

Happy new freaking bloody year. Here's to the wonder that is us xxx 🥂

#LemmyForever

That cleared the head. Pub?

Merry Christmas! xx

Happy Winter Solstice ☀️

It's almost Winter Solstice hallelujah for that. Beer gardens are just around the corner 🍻

It's hard to find the words for how disgusting this is. It completely silences girls' experiences of male violence. It fails to recognise the importance of education for prevention. It ignores the drivers of men's violence. And it's racist.

Oh and for good measure, which party cut police numbers?

Jeffrey Epstein & David Walliams leading all the bulletins but Kemi Badenoch knows that only men from ‘different cultures’ pose a threat to women.

I HAVE FINISHED WORK PRAISE THE LORD #nocheesesforusmeeces

These absolute beauties are off in the post today, spreading goodwill to all men (women, children and dogs) courtesy of @moderntoss.bsky.social

box of cereal is like a quid more than it was six months ago but at least now disabled people can't put their own money towards a car that's nicer than the government thinks they deserve

narrator: 50 years ago...

me: [nods] in 1945

narrator: in 1975...

me: what

I find it really embarrassing when guests visit my house and my dog sniffs their crotch. Especially as he's a chihuahua and I have to lift him up. John Tunney, Corby

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz348bs

I remember in the nineties, people said that dog shit could make you go blind if you got it in your eyes. But you don't hear about it at all nowadays. Has dog shit changed, or have people just stopped putting it in their eyes? Jojo Collie-Cross, Matlock

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz348bs

'I still believe in God but God no longer believes in me' is as prescient a statement as it ever was.

Tees Valley mayor Lord (Ben) Houchen promised renewal. Instead, Britain’s biggest regeneration project has turned into a taxpayer-funded scandal - enriching a few local businessmen while leaving public bodies on the brink.

Watch the latest episode of Page 94, The Private Eye Podcast, on YouTube.