one note parody account devolved into railing abou

those are classy jugs. classy jugs are okay

leaving vague fragments of journals about to trip up future adventurers after the calamity

wanna feel old? this new pill makes your bones so brittle a single fall will kill you

too soon?

got my 2026 bingo card early. not feeling great about "rapid global desertification" being on there but it is in a great location you know bingowise

don't drink the potion it will make you evil or uh wait maybe it was drink the potion it will stop you from turning evil. it was one of those

thx

golt

break glass in case of needing broken glass

those are called highways

i can hardly believe its already the year 21736

bring back turtle graphic

I am having my body replaced with concrete. it will make me nearly indestructible. as far as I can tell the process is without downside

i believe in contraptions

makes you think, i imagine

Smile at animals

1940s movie: (elaborate six stage euphemism for a failed threesome)
world's largest dullard: they sure knew how to make mailboxes back then

i do that in february

(in the special place in hell for people like me) oh wow this place is great, you guys didn't need to do all this. but i want you to know i appreciate it so much

despite many theories, no one knows what happens to the sun when it disappears at night

The term "cyber monday" was coined by William Gibson

the ole er sr

thanks to AI it could soon be much much worse

my job is to make sure when you tear the top off a resealable bag it just kind of misses and doesn't actually open. it doesn't pay big like the team who make it so it doesn't actually reseal, but, hey, it put my yacht through grad school

gotta do something

One of the major problems with zombies is their irresponsible behavior

go in the opposite order and they can do both