Alright. The internet was a good idea but I think it’s about time to get rid of it.

Big dog

Big dog is big

Big dog is bigger than my mom

Just in case you forgot my dog is huge

Very eepy.

“Did you like how I sang you Evanescence this morning?”

“Yeah, you’re always surprising me in bed”

Already finished 12 books this month. I’m on a rampage

I hope this email doesn’t find you

69 days into 2025

I’ve already read 11 books this year.

If you fart in elevators you’re either very funny or a war criminal depending on my mood

Odin begging for a cup of whipped cream from his barista buddies

Odin sunbathing with Beka on the porch, looking regal

Family snow hike selfie. Beka, Odin, and Grantie

Bigger than a horse and more expensive than my car but I wouldn’t trade this time for anything

Today is my dog Odin’s 9th birthday 🥲

There's a Crisis of Masculinity in this country and the only way to solve it is to let me act like a cross between a baby and a movie villain

With eggs this expensive I’m eating the shells

I haven’t bought Civ 7 yet because it’s my partner’s birthday week and I know I am incapable of doing both

I like the way Elmo runs

I don’t have a gun but I bet someone will let me borrow two of theirs

Going to the gun range to practice my Mexican standoffs

Highlight of the Super Bowl:
Tim Robinson featured in commercial.

Philly will burn tonight.

I treat everyone like they could be 3 smaller people in a trench coat. You never know

Immigrants are not my enemy

Does anyone have a Groupon deal for lobotomies?

Funky yellow text on a pink background that reads “FUCK FASCISM”

A first draft of a new creative process. Spray paint on glass.

I’m making art this week. Good for my brain but bad for my back

Pros of doorbell camera:
-Can check on the house when not there
-Safety for packages

Cons of doorbell camera:
-Panic attack from anywhere in the world when any person approaches my front door

A zyn and a round of super hexagon is probably what doing crack feels like

Why can’t fantasy books ever be like, not embarrassing to tell your coworkers about? Can you imagine explaining the character Dumbledore out loud if everyone didn’t already know who he was?

Having one little Excedrine as a treat

This year I’m hoping to jump around more. Kinda hop and scurry about.

I’m worried Tik Tok will be banned and we’ll lose access to cultural giants like that lady who accidentally said “EBT Fart Card” and cannot handle people reminding her about it.