emily 🅱️emily

bad, fire shane bowen

the good news is all the "kafkaesque" jokes we'll be getting; bad news is I was making those for years already and nobody laughed

putting Kafka in charge... might not be the best call lmao

I like Jaxson Dart, he's neat

an NFL on Fox graphic showing current temperatures around the world. Godthab, Greenland is 23 degrees; North Pole, Alaska is 23 degrees; Moscow, Russia is 31 degrees; Green Bay, Wisconsin, which is highlighted as it's the site of the current game, is negative 2 degrees.

easily one of my all-time favorite graphics ever put up during a football game (from the 2007 nfc championship)

oh good they got devito in one of those progressive commercials

my phone vibrated with a text from my dad literally as i opened my messages to text him-- he was sending me my ticket for the giants game in two weeks; i was sending him photos of the newly discovered bumpy snailfish

Screenshot of a portion of the table of contents from a Wikipedia page. The uncollapsed section "Major achievements" contains the subsections "Death" and "Legacy"

hey, wikipedia? you sure?

the thing about grad school is that i DID sign up for this and therefore have no one to blame but myself. however, i do not want to write this paper

A text message exchange. First message from me: Also, the injury update I know you were waiting for: Skattebo had emergency surgery last night for what turned out to be a dislocated ankle, which sounds like it should be not as bad as a broken one, but actually means he possibly has a bunch of torn ligaments or something, which is scary. Also again I cannot stress enough his foot was pointing the wrong way. But surgery went well and now it's just time to tank the rest of the season for draft picks probably Second message, from Ben: The good news is that you can score cheap tickets! Third message, from me: Ben we already have season tickets 😭

ben has no sympathy for me

the thing is. "the sun doesn't physically harm vampires, but has some other visible effect that risks outing them to humans" IS actually an intriguing idea! it's just that "sparkly" is sort of the worst possible option there

literally most recent fic in the nfl rpf tag. i see this is how people are coping with the injury and i respect it even though rpf squicks me out

had the sudden thought "i wonder if they're doing dart/skattebo rpf" and opened ao3 to check and sure enough!!

well! that's it, then! time to find a new hobby for sundays

wow, some really bad officiating in this one already!

when is the next time the eagles play the titans? i have several prometheus jokes i want to finalize beforehand

looking at pictures of lemurs might save me actually

you know when you start a book and can immediately tell it's going to emotionally wreck you?

well, fuck.

fuuuck i wanted the shutout ):

impeccable timing

omg epoisses mentioned on crowd control!! i became obsessed with that cheese after a transcendent experience in high school

completely incapable of focusing on homework today. all i want to do is read and watch coverage of the giants' win it's unreal

i (giants fan living in philly) am about to be SO insufferable today you have no idea

crying happy tears rn. i don't even care if we get stomped in philly in two weeks (she says now, knowing she will probably care a lot in two weeks)

at metlife, in primetime, no less??? UNPRECEDENTED

just remembered "VERY done, Kevin!" and lost it

continually reevaluating my thoughts on becoming a public librarian as i remember it means regularly engaging with the public

unfortunately i am going to find "...is like a filing cabinet" jokes funny for the rest of my life, i suspect

i have once again forgotten to eat anything until 3:30 pm, alas