al mac

Royal Mint guy: ‘what if we made them slippy?’

Wouldn’t it be nice if this Labour government would tax people who can afford to have accountants and tax advisors on retainer.

Anyone want Nine Inch Nails tickets for tomorrow, Manchester UK? I can't make it as my friend has COVID 😭 Listed them at face value, happy for offers. #NIN #NineInchNails

secure.ticketmaster.co.uk/rs/37006229C...

I note Yemen is on Trump's new travel ban, rendering Chandler from Friends' travel plans impossible

Love how it is always “rich guys warn that xyz will become more expensive” and never “rich guys warn that they’ll have fewer space rockets for fun”

I would just like my emails in a chronological list, in my inbox; thanks.
No really.
No no no don’t do tha… Oh.

Nephew is coeliac so I had to FORCE this Honest Burger down last night along with the coleslaw.

True. It’s a strange heady blend of annoyance and gratitude.

@suw.bsky.social @maribiscuits.bsky.social Pocket shits in the bath occasionally for no reason at all so how d’ you like them apples?

Well this is all very pleasant

There’s no way I could be a professional footballer. The Arsenal match doesn’t start til 8pm - I’ve got to be honest I’m considering bed from 7

It’s like an epoch

Greeting from the future. Mars has now been colonised and we’ve achieved world peace. It’s still January 2025

‘Leader of the free world’ is about as accurate as ‘World Series’. Maybe try ‘Bully’?

Folk waiting for lifts up at Elephant & Castle. It’s giving lifeboats on the Titanic.

Trump’s inaugural address centers on pledge to lift a country in ‘decline’ In his second Inaugural Address, the president reprised dark themes from his first and laid out an expansive policy agenda.

President Trump's inaugural address was a misleading assessment of the U.S. It has a growing economy, falling inflation, slowing illegal immigration, a record-breaking stock market, the lowest levels of violent crime in years and a military that has limited engagement in conflicts around the world.

Happy to spend 10 minutes searching for an alternative rather than use any website that has incessant pop ups offering me a 10% discount for my email address

My Lime photography is verging on obsessive

Me to cat: ‘good boy, who’s had a busy day, having a little slepe, good boy’
Black crumpled T-shirt: *no reaponse*

The main draw of the cinema for me is that I’ll actually watch the film and not piss about on my phone

First day back in the office, and another layer added to Moleskine Mountain

I have received an Achievements of the Year email from Moonpig.

Tears for Pocket

I am constantly insulted on this platform

The trope of not knowing what day it is during twixtmas must surely be dead now. And yet incessant memery.

Sauron welcoming the Baby Jebus by London Bridge

The glorious ‘trad advent calendar’ journey has reached its end with a classic

Until today I fully believed Nigel Planer and Tim McInnery were the same person.

I see what you did there.

Congrats to Apple Intelligence for creating a Memoji that has managed to look like me but also look nothing like me at the same time. A quantum selfie