@touchofalchemy.bsky.social
Whisky drinking redhead. Mama of boys, herder of cats, snuggler of dogs. 5' of snark. Occasionally NSFW To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. --Oscar Wilde
He looks so happy!!!❤️
29.03.2025 22:13 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Tornado season in the midwest means sleeping naked is extra risky
15.03.2025 05:55 — 👍 17 🔁 4 💬 2 📌 0Did you know there’s a prize at the end of a tube of Chapstick?
09.03.2025 16:12 — 👍 118 🔁 37 💬 15 📌 0I'm full of nachos and social awkwardness
09.03.2025 04:50 — 👍 227 🔁 73 💬 9 📌 1To be clear: a tariff is a tax.
09.03.2025 13:41 — 👍 59688 🔁 9308 💬 1353 📌 402Why is it that I would consider smothering a snoring human, but a cat snoring is pretty adorable?
09.03.2025 18:36 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 04AM and wide awake
There will be no springing in my "springing ahead" today
I see the orange shitgibbon is entering his Saruman phase
Not that the illiterate mango would know, but the Ents really hated him tearing up the trees
Before my modeling career really took off, I was huge in orthopedic shoe catalogs.
08.03.2025 20:13 — 👍 73 🔁 20 💬 5 📌 0Can’t wait till I’m rich enough to put a weird and unnecessary staircase in my house
08.03.2025 22:50 — 👍 136 🔁 51 💬 12 📌 1I may be a last desperate option, but I'm YOUR last desperate option.
08.03.2025 22:37 — 👍 13 🔁 7 💬 0 📌 0I may be an asshole but at least I’m not bleached.
08.03.2025 23:16 — 👍 5 🔁 4 💬 0 📌 0Livin' la vida lub dub.
09.03.2025 01:38 — 👍 7 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0Don't be angry with me because I spoke the truth. Be angry with me because I'm an asshole.
09.03.2025 02:51 — 👍 186 🔁 77 💬 3 📌 1I cut myself on the plastic lid of the fruit salad container. That's it, no more healthy eating.
09.03.2025 04:13 — 👍 164 🔁 18 💬 7 📌 0If you don't believe in reproductive rights for women you shouldn't have sex with women.
09.03.2025 04:00 — 👍 232 🔁 75 💬 7 📌 0My birthstone is a pet rock
09.03.2025 03:55 — 👍 33 🔁 11 💬 2 📌 0Building up a banned book library
Sometimes they're books I've not read, sometimes just newer printings without my old school notes scribbled in the margins
A few books each pay period
Slowly filling space on my shelves
😂 Indeed
09.03.2025 03:23 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
One guess why these ended up in the kitchen drawer 🙄
08.03.2025 21:18 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0Silver lining:
Europe became a Union yesterday.
🇪🇺
On my long list of life's bullshit that irritates me is being allergic to certain kinds of booze
Why couldn't I be allergic to goats instead of Heineken and Magners...and champagne...malbec...chardonnay....
2 hour long manager training on being present for folks and actively listening
And I'm distracted on social media
Right On...
24.02.2025 16:50 — 👍 445 🔁 102 💬 7 📌 1I just want to be important enough to say “Leave us” to a roomful of people and empty the room
25.02.2025 14:21 — 👍 377 🔁 60 💬 15 📌 2
"I found them. The Frosted Mega Wheats." (Picture of rounds hay bales with snow on their tops)
🥣
#justforlaughs #funny #meme
25.02.2025 16:49 — 👍 38 🔁 13 💬 2 📌 0
Y’all are invited.
25.02.2025 05:58 — 👍 14 🔁 2 💬 3 📌 0This morning at Dept of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) HQ in DC as mandatory return to office began, this video played on loop for ~5 mins on screens throughout the building, per agency source.
Building staff couldn’t figure out how to turn it off so sent people to every floor to unplug TVs.
Dear Europe,
Trump completely melts under pushback.
So push back.
