The act of “signing” for anything is purely performative at this point. Like I have no idea what I just scribbled on that pad, I don’t even know what you’re comparing it to anymore and I probably can’t even convincingly even forge my own signature but sure let’s keep on doing this forever I guess
25.07.2025 15:28 — 👍 305 🔁 13 💬 8 📌 1
I think there should be a universally recognized “no guilt trip” amnesty for cancelling plans you agreed to more than six months ago. Like, I have lived several lives since January and I’ve grown old and weary and I mean yes, congrats on the wedding and stuff but
listen…
30.05.2025 14:48 — 👍 277 🔁 14 💬 8 📌 3
Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie in the apocalypse is all the walking.
28.04.2025 20:06 — 👍 443 🔁 28 💬 42 📌 4
Good morning #BlueSky 😁💙
Me at the gym. 😂
26.04.2025 15:47 — 👍 5193 🔁 533 💬 154 📌 42
The act of sending loved ones little videos and memes and things throughout the day is called “pebbling” because penguins often leave little rocks in the nests of those they care about as a sign of affection. Today is world penguin day, so if someone sends you this post, know you’ve been pebbled ;)
25.04.2025 16:22 — 👍 568 🔁 103 💬 17 📌 8
Casual Fridays just aren’t doing it anymore, we need ‘airport rules’ Fridays where you can wear sweatpants and day drinking is allowed and you can nap wherever you want and you have to go to at least one bookstore
23.04.2025 13:33 — 👍 545 🔁 55 💬 22 📌 5
21.04.2025 01:32 — 👍 80 🔁 17 💬 4 📌 2
16.04.2025 01:45 — 👍 86 🔁 9 💬 0 📌 0
did you take your meds
did you eat something
did you construct a totem to ward off the ancient evil
15.04.2025 14:46 — 👍 87 🔁 21 💬 10 📌 1
13.04.2025 12:40 — 👍 17984 🔁 1220 💬 720 📌 131
07.04.2025 13:37 — 👍 117 🔁 21 💬 4 📌 0
Wishing I was doing something I want to do while doing the right thing.
27.03.2025 20:42 — 👍 73 🔁 30 💬 2 📌 0
human beings can't be "illegal", hope that helps 💜
27.03.2025 19:03 — 👍 359 🔁 84 💬 5 📌 1
What I lack in motivation I make up for in finding places to sit down.
25.03.2025 12:51 — 👍 284 🔁 103 💬 5 📌 2
i'm beauty and i'm grace
i put coffee in my face
21.03.2025 12:35 — 👍 189 🔁 43 💬 8 📌 0
Now would be a great time for a mysterious elderly relative I've never met before to die and leave me a haunted castle by a lake in the deep woods
21.03.2025 00:44 — 👍 43 🔁 12 💬 3 📌 2
I still get asked why I don't like to go out and it's like look, if you can find another place that has my pets, my favorite snacks, my person, my couch, my TV, my books, my own personal bathroom, and where I have complete control over the guest list, then I will totally meet you there
19.03.2025 14:06 — 👍 420 🔁 42 💬 14 📌 3
if i was ever given riddles to get past a bridge i would just turn around and go home to bed
16.03.2025 05:49 — 👍 235 🔁 71 💬 8 📌 0
Embracing nihilistic optimism. Maybe things will not matter in a better way tomorrow
14.03.2025 16:29 — 👍 429 🔁 118 💬 10 📌 7
13.03.2025 12:40 — 👍 153 🔁 28 💬 9 📌 5
Any time it rains you should be able to leave work early to go to the bookstore
13.03.2025 14:09 — 👍 5292 🔁 460 💬 150 📌 47
Trying to train my immune system to attack my enemies instead.
12.03.2025 19:13 — 👍 499 🔁 89 💬 20 📌 5
I’m sorry I am sure you have an excellent point but they took away the hour I had allocated to care about it
09.03.2025 16:53 — 👍 1768 🔁 123 💬 20 📌 4
10.03.2025 11:43 — 👍 7616 🔁 895 💬 70 📌 45
May your days be many and your hoodie strings always be even
09.03.2025 00:21 — 👍 696 🔁 34 💬 13 📌 3
I’m not losing an hour this weekend. That hour is losing me.
08.03.2025 20:22 — 👍 680 🔁 154 💬 12 📌 5
Coffee owls
☕☕☕
05.03.2025 16:11 — 👍 150 🔁 19 💬 11 📌 1
You: Oh my god the house is on fire!
Me (wise, has read books): And you're surprised? Houses have been on fire before [as the flames consume us both] Furthermore,
01.03.2025 16:20 — 👍 14077 🔁 1684 💬 156 📌 62
02.03.2025 02:22 — 👍 108 🔁 17 💬 3 📌 2
promoting all that is wild, dark & enchanting 🌲 supporting animal rescue, rights & welfare 🐾 antifascist ⚔️, vegan Ⓥ, female-run ✨ http://fiadh.bandcamp.com
http://instagram.com/fiadhproductions
Emotionally fluent | Selectively social | Honest, not harsh | Soft, not weak | 🐾 Animal person | ✍️ Writes things | 🤘🏻 Gen X | 🌴 LA | https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:qut5myo23afai4odf3z25trw/feed/aaadwsj277rdi
I didn't realize I was supposed to know how to do everything by my second rodeo. That's still a very low number of rodeos.
Welcome to the positive side of Bluesky! My name is J and I'm from the UK. I Post uplifting, animal videos. 😀
not the darth u are looking for
I don't usually actually wear a bowl on my head. Usually.
Mostly food, games, and silliness. Tech sometimes probably. This is my personal account, thoughts are my own.
I’m not here to post my THOUGHTS. I’m not here to share IDEAS. I’m here to post PICTURES OF MUSHROOMS and BE AN IDIOT
Sign up for mushie-mail: cheerful letters filled with stickers, prints, and other goodies > Patreon.com/luke_venechuk
My greatest miracle was being a blonde haired blue 👀 white guy from the Middle East
It's really cute that you're gonna "defeat me with the power of friendship and all," but again, I am the devil from the Bible
fascists not welcome
Better than the one on twitter.
No, it’s not hormones, I’m always this unpleasant.
Favstar has-been
Recent: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahccdnlzcz4
Popular: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6cru4zjayaugsxgzysz223ts/feed/aaahcc3hp2o6s
Correspondent on the Daily Show. Standup Comic & Emmy-nominated writer. Listen to the Josh Johnson Show podcast on Spotify + Apple
https://linktr.ee/joshjohnsoncomedy
🇬🇾/🇨🇦 | Master Fitted-Sheet Folder | #ADHD | ⚓️ Baby | he/him
📍Tkaranto, Toronto, ON
mastodon.social/@rvbdrm
Profile: A brown man in a tuxedo standing in an office.
Banner: Toronto Blue Jays 2025 MLB Postseason logo.
Grilled Cheese Award Winning, Fully Automated, Luxury Anarchist Syndicate
Posts written in a kind of obsolete vernacular.
🔀⚧️
Shared Brain - they/she/he/I/my/we/our in a constant superposition
Commissions & Shop: https://artbymox.shop/contact
I do voices and stuff. I also do marketing for things. I write and produce crap and occasionally get on stage and make people laugh. I’m open for work and comic conventions.
tv writer, actress, living in the city of angels, singing about leopards. shop.franchesca.net
the sea hates a coward
they/he
Official Gov Description: Flight challenged colony of biracial nudists
SIGN to protect Island’s Marine Reserve https://wwf.org.au/get-involved/an-antarctic-safe-haven/
@penguinsagainsttrump on Threads
Staff software engineer. AWS/CDK/TypeScript.
Interests: Pink Floyd, Star Trek, coding, biking, VR, cats. Not necessarily in this order.
@anydoubts.bsky.social is my better half.
imaginary internet person
will eventually finish my graphic novel