Timmy Two-Eyes

And studies have shown paedophilia to be between 5 and 10% so I'm gonna keep calling them freaks, thanks.

Are you still on about this? Fuck me it isn't that fucking important.

I hope you get the plague 😘

Stella? Good lord.

There's no way you googled anything, as the relevant definition is the first result.

Same.

That's not why they're not dishwasher safe, you onion.

Definition of GIFT a notable capacity, talent, or endowment; something voluntarily transferred by one person to another without compensation; the act, right, or power of giving… See the full definition

www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/g...

Gifted is correct.

But she did say it sometimes?

What a boring fess, Rob 😄

Adults have bedrooms. You know that, right?

Survivorship bias

Have to, or Get to?

"I now have mouth herpes."

Tell her you want to start torrenting a show that you like.

Please don't say it like that

You sound pretty sad yourself.

Who includes their spouse in a dating profile picture?

Morons who ignore film ratings, I guess.

Normal people absolutely do not suck their wounds.

Mine did.

One of my childhood bullies is in prison for murder and another died of a rare disease and it's so satisfying.

No one wants a sour sausage for supper.

Service is extra.

And as we all know, gay people don't exist...

"Oh, my!"

How is everyone surprised that the evil corporation chose money? This isn't news.

Oh fuck off, I bet you're insufferable.

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