maggie

One thing that’s good about my post-London sports arc is that it either strengthens my willpower or just straight up saps my energy from engaging in bad habits. I’m sleeping better, drinking less, and am frequently mistaken for a WNBA player while walking around, all of which are great for the brain

There are (almost) dozen(s) of us!

It’s ridiculous that I know more trans fencers from NJ than I do people named John

I’m not a big believer in things being trans coded or doing certain activities as a kid being egg behavior, but someone needs to do a study on trans people from NJ who grew up fencing. Added two more to the list after the Basketdolls tournament yesterday, which makes 10 that I personally know

#1 seed in non-Brooklyn bracket lfg

labubu? what, was el ouchies taken?

Also, it's hiliarious that the M and F trains are swapping routes into Manhattan later this year

Maggie’s workout week. It reads: August 2025 Today Volleyball 568CAL Basketball 725CAL Wednesday Volleyball 815CAL Tuesday Volleyball 545CAL Monday Basketball 332CAL Sunday Volleyball 1,211CAL

I swear I have friends and other interests

Slowly turning into the type of person that only wears sports bras and workout shorts, mostly out of necessity

I did long distance with my ex for a year which was difficult for ✨reasons✨ and despite telling myself I’d never do it again I actually doubled down and asked myself why not try again but this time across continents?

Boyfriend’s plane tickets are secured I can’t wait to show him my favorite places and also get laid again

James Franco in the “First Time?” Meme template

got a bill for this today wish it wasn't so goddamn expensive to be cuckoo banana pants in this country

You’ve seen her chuck a T-shirt across the arena, now watch her punt a dildo into the fourth row

I do think it’s funny that my outside hitter is like “this profile is built for the female gaze” and I’m thinking bro this is entirely male gaze fetishization of your body

Listening to the 25 year olds on my volleyball talking about dating profile strategies and thanking my lucky stars I swore off the apps for good

I’m tempted to respond with the “))<>(( I want to poop back and forth with the same poop. Forever” bit from Me and You and Everyone We Know

A WhatsApp text from an overconfident man. It reads: And if you eat ass you can have a feast there too 12:28 Back and forth 12:29

Love chatting with men

I've done the walk (and bike ride) before, but not advisable if you're going out for a night of drinking

Loved how when I lived in Queens I had to take the E>G>L>M to get my friend's place in Ridgewood 2.1 miles away

At the level of soreness from six hours of volleyball where I’m using my hitachi to massage my glutes

Let me tell you something, I haven't even begun to quake. And when I do quake, you'll know. Because I'm gonna quake so hard that everybody on the east coast's gonna feel it

A haus of decline comic on a bathroom door. The two characters are engaged in anal sex. It reads: Panel one: “I’m going to hack that ass” Panel two: beep beep boop boop Panel three: (the top, wearing sunglasses, inserts) Panel four: (the top) “I’m in”

irl @hausofdecline.bsky.social sighting

(Whimsically) bing bong

Oh so that’s why Marina doesn’t want to be traded anymore 👀

Dove really saw the 2-in-1 shampoo/conditioner market and said hold my beer and made a deodorant spray to use everywhere

Didn’t get much burn when I played in college so this storybook account of a play from my senior year will have to do

We love our establishments ending in Z, don’t we folks

Maybe I can at least find a mouth guard that doubles as vampire fangs