Avocado’s Number 🥑

This! While the “women at home” were no doubt doing unpaid labor.

Got straight A's at the Mike Johnson School of Deflection

Who used the soybeans farmers as pawns?

Sounds like you’re getting in some good practice. 😉

Dude: I hope I learn how to use “thusly” correctly in a sentence.

This is Fall-Leaves Fashion Week, straight off the runway stuff of legend. Werk.

It’s got Stalin Vibes and I can’t understand why every single person isn’t sharpening their pitchforks right now.

Actually said to someone today, "have a good weekend!"

So, how's your tuesday going?

I for real told someone, "have a good weekend," today. Tuesday.

it's never "i need to step up my game so I can match her bad ass energy."

I solemnly promise to run around the constitution, so help me God

A kid in a darth Vader mask, holding bagpipes, wearing a t shirt and kilt, pausing while riding a unicycle. He is dressed as Portland’s Unipiper. The screenshot is of a repost of the photo with comment from the Unipiper that says, “ Unipiper Oct 27, 2018 • © Who else still doesn't have a costume yet?? Here's an idea from @jelloblogger - just be The Unipiper!! Sadly, according to my wife, I'm not allowed to be the Unipiper for Halloween So let me know in the comments what you think I should be. Any help is appreciated!!”

That time my kid dressed up as the Unipiper for Halloween and the actual Unipiper reposted.

Stay the course! You are doing God's work.

Much cheaper? where are you getting your avocados?

bathrooms aren't my lane.

John, chapter 14
1. I woke up thinking about how my grandmother used to make a dish called Hanging Gardens Whitefish. She ate it all the time when she was held captive in Babylon, and today I just had to recreate it.
2. Grandma always at the best stories. One time . . .
3. (See verse 42 for recipe)

Remember when Mike Dukakis sat in a tank, or when Howard Dean screamed funny at a rally?

Simpler times.

grEy if you're in England
grAy if you're in America (US)

Or really, do whatever you want.

He's mean to me, emotionally manipulates me, humiliates me in front of my friends and family who can't stand him. Should I stay with him?

6 to 7 women sitting in church pews shown from the back. One can assume they are wearing strapless bridesmaid dresses, and yet from behind, seated in the pew, no dress fabric is visible. They all look completely naked.

It's kind of giving strapless bridesmaid dresses.

STOP! 🛑

Mandatory wallpaper check!

Me as Zoey with corn eyes from K Pop Demon Hunters.

Oh, you should totally watch it. Here’s my costume. Your niece can explain …

I identify as “Simpson.”

Can’t stop admiring the gorgeous fall foliage? You’re not contemplative and reflective about the fleeting seasons of our lives and the meaningful, but somehow sad cycle of birth, life and death, not just of the physical self, but of the spiritual self as well. It’s just high cortisol.

If you don’t want to get out of bed in the morning, you’re not lazy, you just have high cortisol.

If you don’t know what to make for dinner tonight, you’re not stupid, you just have high cortisol.

Are you thinking of Adam Sharp?

A picture of a door and door jam that has been painted over many times, and yet is still a little chipped and shabby looiking. It has one of those sliding bolt locks, except the bolt has been broken off, and a Cheeto is being used in it's place. There is text in blue just above that says "le Louvre."

But it is a brie flavored Cheeto.

You gotta watch K-pop Demon Hunters. 😉

I was pretty popular among the pre teen girls at the church trunk or treat tonight.