Brian Prisco

“OOH, OOH, Do me Next!” Shouts shaved gorilla and sentient mound of cookie dough.

Thank God for Bluesky or I’d have to enjoy things without being guilted into shame.

I need someone to teach me hacking, quick. I mean, yes, I’m going to immediately eradicate my student debt because duh. I want to go into the internet searches of every politician and religious leader responsible for the age verification obscenity laws and post every one of their site visits.

I don’t want him to die.

I want him ousted from office.

I want him sent to jail in New York.

I want him to live in the festering puddle of his own disintegrating mind as his faculties leave him one by one until he forgets how to breathe and suffocates slowly to death.

I want him to the pain.

Supreme Disappointment

If Dean Cain is ICE, his fatass is one of those giant sphere cubes they put in bourbon glasses.

It’s like every new distraction they release makes you realize Trump’s involvement in the Epstein Files must be even worse than you think.

Trump definitely molested a teen.
Trump had a teen pee on him.
Trump murdered a teen who giggles at his teeny peeny.
Trump ate that teen as a hamburger.

Can’t wait for the first lawsuit from someone being airborne doused by hot Starbucks.

That’s all I really could hope for. Awesome to hear.

How did you like it?

Are you seeing Hundreds of Beavers? Hope you like it! I’ve heard nothing but great things.

Psssh. Baseball on a NASCAR track.

Call me when they make NASCAR drivers have to run the bases with their cars.

Bernie Moreno should be scared to travel to major cities because he’s a Columbian immigrant who had to pay out wage theft settlements.

According to his own political party, this makes him a thug member of Tren de Aragua and means ICE can snatch him without a trial and deport him to El Salvador.

I’m currently at the Ohio State Fair. Last year, one in 4 or 5 people were wearing pro-Trump gear and there were 3 or 4 farmers market stands prominently displaying it.

This year, I saw one stand with two items almost hidden. And I’ve yet to see anyone wearing stuff.

Maybe we’re winning?

I have eaten a deep fried taco and we drank a Buckeye lemonade, a lemonade with chocolate and peanut butter added.

We must protect state fairs at all costs.

Please be careful.

I was gonna post this about the tsunamis to my friends on the West Coast, Hawaii, and Japan.

But it kind of just applies to everything.

So I dunno.

Be careful.

Shit’s fucked.

I read that as “Mullins Admits He Killed Epstein to Cover For Trump.” Which is definitely a thing he would claim.

I missed the word “resolution” and, my friend, that was a very different headline I read in my head.

Here’s a little South Park math:

They signed a deal for 5 years and ten episodes a season. So 50 episodes.

And that brutal ass finishing move ending the episode, that was labeled as PSA 1 of 50.

So I’m guessing they’ll end EVERY EPISODE from here on with one of those.

Oh please, sweet dear baby lord Jesus who lives six miles above Dayton, OH. Please let this entire season of South Park go that fucking hard and even harder.

At first I saw the combo of trending Hulk Hogan and Air Bud and I’m like “oh what the fuck, the dog’s wrestling now?”

Fuck. Air Bud is getting a remake. Am I still contractually obligated to do a real time review of this one?

Hulk Hogan died.
He was a reeeeeeaaal American.*

*derogatory

Lynd Fruit Farm in Pataskala. Open til 5. They’ve got a bunch of flavors.

“Having a birthday, huh? Must be nice to be able to focus on getting older while other people are dying because of the atrocities in the US. I’d make a wish that more people would care about what’s going on around them than some arbitrary anniversary. But that’s just me.” - Bluesky, always.

Oh c’mon. It’s sweet. Too sweet. Oh, god, it’s way too sweet. Need…need my insulin. My vision, contracting. Going to blackout.

I have watched Dirty Rotten Scoundrels countless times and it was only tonight I realized that Michael Caine’s butler was played by Emperor Palpatine.

Aw, dammit. She was definitely one of my favorite professors. And people.