The One Who Cums

It's too late. I've already portrayed myself as the bilateral biting Tyrannosaurus Rex, and you as the aligned biting Allosaurus

A pyramid stands in the background, in the middle of construction. "How tf did they build this without any" adderall and white monster are pictured below

"Dicks and Cum" is the only language I speak

In true tradition, mothers' warning sons about women who are just like them

Iunno why but I imagine her as an older jewish lady "do you know how many diseases these filthy Makhasheyfe have?!"

Operator: In 30 seconds, cross the street and enter the taco bell

Me: HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL OF THIS?!?

Operator: There's a timer on the crosswalk

there should be a service where if you get too high you can call a number and get guided through places and situations like Neo on the phone with Morpheus

Shout out to vices. Vices gotta be a top 10 thing to indulge in

What do y'all think "the birds and the bees" talk looks like in the Cars universe?

I feel like in this metaphor, the bad news machine was only off for repairs

The terminator sees this and decides to go back in time to kill Mark Zuckerberg

Sometimes you gotta do something to make the day more bearable

He feared for his life

CIA director: he fell for a honeypot

Bear CIA agent: *sweats*

Bear Cop: Put your hands in the air

Guy: *Raises Hands*

Bear Cop: *fires 37 rounds into his chest*

Bear Cop: Did you see how big he got?

Bear teacher: If you know the answer, please raise your hand

Students: *raises their hands*

Bear teacher: woah, how'd you guys get so big?

I would put them on restaurant menus

There are months when no cereal is eaten, and there are weeks when months of cereal are eaten

Garfield looking onward with his traditional smug stare, a qr code for (https://youtu.be/YbaTur4A1OU?si=m8EGcKqoDKVUa8-S) floats in front of him. He says "huh. I wonder who that's for"

Me whenever I see a QR code:

She is all of us, we are blinded by the things we want, left in utter darkness by our greed and ambition

What I mean when I say I'm standing on business

They don't kniw that shit is basically rubber cement when it hits warm water

The last thing a hotdog sees before I deepthroat that glizzy to my wrist

A person looking down in disbelief.

The bar has bisexual lighting

My brain cells getting ready to make a 4 word post with 3 typos

Its gotta be, I found this statistical evidence to prove it

Boutta put my grain in her silo

I call it "My Giant Futa Cock"

Giving this to @cockremover.bsky.social and watching her inact a jihad against these people

Its true. Either way, the man was whippin weiner